Source of Eternal Frustration

[Please don't throw rocks or pointy objects at me, I am so so sorry that it has taken me almost a year to kick my brain into gear and write this chapter!

This is still a bit rough, I'm waiting to hear back from my Beta, but my overwhelming guilt combined with my impatient inner 10-year-old resulted in me posting this anyway!

I hope that someone still wants to read this, because I'm actually hopeful that I will be able to finish it!

Please read, enjoy, like and review! :D .]


Agreeing


Oh god. Whatever happened to safe zone? This was supposed to be his haven, away from drunk fathers, annoying teachers and most importantly, as due to more recent events, Kaiba.

Now Kaiba was sitting here in his living room, and he couldn’t for the life of him decide whether or not it was a bad thing.

Kaiba was looking around his combined living room / dining room / kitchen with a carefully constructed neutral face, but soon zeroed in on nothing but Jou, the couch he was sitting on and the can of corn with the fork that kept working his improvised dinner into his constantly chewing mouth. The mask cracked a bit in what Jou guessed was mild disgust at his table manners. Jou didn’t really care, he wasn’t sitting at a real table and it was his home. His apartment, his rules. He could, and would, eat like a caveman if he wanted to.

As he kept shovelling corn in a most unflattering fashion, he thought back to five minutes earlier, when he had been surprised by Kaiba.

They had just stood there looking at each other until Kaiba finally had broken the silence.

“Are we going to stand here all night or are you going to invite me inside, Mutt?” he said with a slightly condescending tone.

Jou had been taken completely by surprise at the presence at his front door, and was as eloquent as that situation could have him be, “um, but – how ..”, he finally regained control of his thoughts and formulated an actual sentence, “what are you doing here, Moneybags?”

Kaiba clearly couldn’t contain himself at that question and rolled his eyes at the blond in the doorway as he slowly pronounced each word, like Jou was an imbecile, “you told me to think about our.. situation. I have. I assumed that meant that we should actually talk about it afterwards?”

“Yeah, sure, but.. Here? Now?” came the hesitant reply from the inside.

“You sounded like you wanted us to talk sooner rather than later, and I’m not driving back without having had this conversation with you. So?”

And thus Jou had reluctantly let the brunette into his home and engaged in a very awkward moment in the hallway when he moved to lock his door, since the hallway really didn’t have enough room for two people to be standing comfortably next to each other. Wiggling past Kaiba, locking the door and relocating both of them into his only presentable room (his bedroom was out of the question) had proved to be quite the task. He had placed himself in the couch again, picked up his can of corn and gestured for Kaiba to “make himself comfortable”.

So here they were, awkward silence in place, thick enough to cut through, and he was waiting for the silent CEO to pick up the mantle and open the conversation. He had been the one adamant about doing this tonight, so Jou saw no problem in letting him start and carry the conversation. Jou himself had absolutely no idea about what to say to the teenage multi-millionaire sitting opposite him in his old worn-out armchair. He had been embarrassingly, hazardously honest with the blue-eyed prick last time he had seen him, so he didn’t really have anything left to say. Or anything that would help the impending Conversation of Doom, and he didn’t think yelling and cursing would be useful in the current situation, no matter how much he thought the brunette deserved it. He thought it was a positive thing that Kaiba had actually showed up at his front door, no matter how scary also (how the hell did he know his address?!), and some hope had started sneaking into his core at the thought. He tried to squash it before Kaiba could get a chance to, reasoning that it would be less painful this way.

But he couldn’t afford to be girly and scared about it either, he had boldly laid himself out before the other, and he would follow through with it, and if he got turned down, at least he could walk out of this with his head held high like a man. And if it worked then … Good?

As he stubbornly waited for Kaiba to start talking, the corn slowly vanished from the can and his patience, whatever he possessed, was vanishing at even greater speed than the corn. He was getting fidgety despite himself, and was loosing the battle of shutting up and letting Kaiba open the conversation. Jou couldn’t handle silence very well like this, and finally his patience ran out and he stopped shovelling corn into his mouth. He swallowed and looked into the blue eyes opposite him.

“Are you going to sit there all night or did you actually have something to say, Moneybags?” he said in a slightly mocking mimic of what the brunette had said to him five minutes ago.

Kaiba looked like he was actually going to smile for a moment, but caught himself in the action and kept the mask firmly in place.

“Yes. Our previous conversation was quite enlightening, so to speak,” Kaiba spoke like he had chosen the words carefully.

“Uh hum?” Jou voiced his agreement on that statement.

Silence ensued once more, and Jou couldn’t handle the way Kaiba was looking at him. Like he was something that was amusing to the rich prat, like he was something beneath the other boy, something to be studied and laughed about, before getting thrown aside. He shoved those feelings aside and regained his usual flippant attitude, rolling his eyes at the silent brunette.

“Aaand..?” he said, dragging the word out.

Kaiba exhaled and finally just looked at Jou with a slightly more serious expression, not the superior one that he had had before, “You said that you like me. Is that true?”

Jou’s breath became slightly shaky. Well, it was a reasonable question. “Yeah, it is,” and then he added under his breath, “for God knows what reason..”

Picking up on the muttered afterthought, Kaiba said, “oh, I can think of many” with a self-satisfied smirk that bordered on lecherous as he eyed Jou with a different gleam in his eyes.

“Oh please, go and get yourself and your giant ego a room, it’s not just that you’re hot.” Jou exclaimed with an eye-roll.

Kaiba raised an amused eyebrow, “you think I’m hot?”

“No! Um, I mean.. -” he fumbled around for words inside his head for a short moment. He could see that Kaiba was greatly enjoying himself. How the hell did he end up as the laughing-stock about something so obvious? Oh well, if it was obvious, why not state the obvious? He took in a breath, stabling himself for the inevitable; complimenting the asshole: “of course you’re hot, you prick. Why the hell else would all those girls be drooling all over you, aside from all your money?”

“So you are after my looks and my assets, Mutt?” Kaiba asked, a small amused expression creeping into his face.

“Ah, hell no! And quit it with the dog remarks!”

Kaiba completely ignored the last part and continued, “why not? You could certainly need some cash judging by the run-down box you are calling an apartment, I mean -”

Jou stood up very abruptly and looked at the billionaire with very hard eyes, “you cannot show up in my apartment unannounced and then start insulting my home. It may not be much, but it’s mine.” He pointed towards the hallway and front-door, “Now get the hell out of my apartment if you can’t handle sitting in something that didn’t cost a fortune to buy.”

He stood there fuming as Kaiba looked at him with assessing eyes, then smiled a bit as he shook his head slightly. “Never mind about your apartment, Jounouchi, it’s not what I came to discuss. And I am sitting just fine.”

Jou sat down still looking upset, “then get to the point, asshole, and stop insulting me at every chance you get, it’s not exactly a charm of yours that I’m fond of.”

Kaiba inclined his head, “fair enough.”

Jou deflated a bit and looked and Kaiba with a flabbergasted expression, “… Fair enough? Seriously, that’s all it took? I’ve told you to stop insulting me, like a million times?!”

“No, you’ve told me to ‘shut the fuck up’, there’s a big difference.”

Jou looked at Kaiba with an unbelieving expression before sighing and running his hands over his face and through his hair. This wasn’t the time to ponder Kaiba’s bizarre reasoning.

He exhaled deeply and said, “So, what did you want to say?”

“Well, as much as I first considered this to be only an attraction of your looks, you did raise a valid point in the library.”

“Wow, you actually thought I said something worth listening to? Shocker. So, what did I say?”

Kaiba chose to ignore the sarcasm in the reply and answered, “Why do I care? Why do I care if Bakura touched you or whether or not you liked it. If it was simply a matter of sex, then it shouldn’t really matter, regardless of my .. territorial nature.”

Wow, ‘territorial nature’, understatement of the year, Jou couldn’t help but think.

“And then you said that you actually liked me, which, I must admit, came a bit out of the blue. So I contemplated how I feel about this whole predicament and I came to the conclusion that maybe there was something more. And since you’ve made your objective quite clear, I just had to check and inform you of my thoughts before we move further.”

“What do you feel then?”

“Something, though I’m not quite sure what just yet. Other than an urge to slam you against any nearby flat surface and -”

“Hold it right there, I don’t need any details on that one.” Jou paused. “So, what do you suggest?”

“Well, the couch you’re sitting on could -”

Jou rolled his eyes, “that’s not what I meant, you pervert. What do we do about -” he almost couldn’t pronounce the word, “us.”

Kaiba couldn’t help but smile, but then he was serious again. “Well, we should try dating for a substantial amount of time to see if there is more to this than your hot ass.”

Jounouchi spluttered heavily here, and silently thanked God that he hadn’t been eating or drinking at that moment, else he would have sprayed it all over the table between them. ‘your hot ass’ was not something he had EVER thought he would hear Seto Kaiba say, and much less to him.

“Um, okay, just let me think for a second.” He tried to buy some time before Kaiba’s obviously deeply perverted mind urged him to do… something. Jou went through everything Kaiba had said in his head, and suddenly came to a jerking hold at ‘had to check’. He looked at Kaiba with slightly narrowed eyes, “you had to check what exactly?”

“Your motives of course. As you have already said, I am an affluent businessman and there are many people who would like to get a piece of my wealth and corporation, with the sought after addition of being allowed into my bedroom.” Came the arrogant reply, said as if it was the most natural thing.

“You, you-” Jou started and stopped a couple of times before regaining the proper use of speech, “you had to check whether or not I would sleep with you for your money or stinking firm?! SERIOUSLY?! What the hell do you take me for?!”

“Well, I must admit that I didn’t really believe that you would do that, but I had to make sure.”

Jou sat silently for a minute before opening his mouth, “I should seriously throw you out of my home for even saying that, like I’m some fucking whore.” He spat the last word out and stared evilly at Kaiba for a long time, and when Kaiba continued looking non apologetic and even looked slightly amused, Jou’s very limited patience snapped. “I am going to throw you out.”

He stood up and gestured to the front-door, and said as politely as he could currently manage, “it’s been a swell time Kaiba-boy, don’t get lost on your way out.”

Kaiba silently got up from the deep, old, worn, patched up, arm-chair and walked past the couch and Jou, and out of sight into the hallway.

Jou sighed and ran his hand through his hair. ‘Arrogant asshole – he-‘

Suddenly Kaiba’s voice sounded from the hallway, “your door won’t open.”

Jou sighed and got up and walked out into the hallway to help the so-called genius out of a freaking door. Before he got far into the hall, hands had grabbed him and slammed him up against the wall, holding him there with an iron grip. Startled he looked up into blue eyes that help much more emotion than they had when he brunette had walked out of the room. Kaiba leaned down and kissed him, and Jou could feel the spark from the kiss run of and down his spine. The kiss wasn’t as aggressive as he had thought it would be, it was more coaxing, feeling, slower.

Kaiba pulled back and looked with a serious expression at the shocked blond in his hands, “never think of yourself as a whore, that’s not what I meant.”

Jou was still angry, “well you have a fucking weird way of expressing yourself, then!”

Kaiba sighed, “and you are an unbelievable hot-head who doesn’t consider much before acting.”

Jounouchi gave a small wry grin and shrugged his shoulders the best he could. “That’s just the way I’m wired.”

“But, are we clear that I do not think of you as a whore?” Kaiba insisted.

“Yeah yeah, sure.”

“Good, because it’s very important. Are we good then? Is everything okay?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” Kaiba leaned down and gave his lips a peck. “So, I can ask you out on a date, then?”

Jou’s face gained an interesting hue of red as the reality of what they were talking about dawned on him. “Um, yeah, you can..”

“Excellent.”

The following kiss was much more aggressive and Kaiba’s tongue was nearly demanding Jou’s to participate, and hands had left their holding-place, and started wondering all over the smaller body sandwiched between Seto and the wall.

“Whoa, hold up-” Jou started and pushed Kaiba a little bit back. He couldn’t think properly when those hands were doing things to him! “No sex.”

Kaiba leaned back a bit and stared incredulously at the blond, “at all?”

Jou blushed even darker and shook his head in a rushed movement. “No no, that’s not what I meant. It’s just - … not now. Could we just, I don’t know..” He stopped when he realized how freaking girly he sounded when he said what he intended to say. “Take it a bit slower?”

Kaiba sighed. “Sure, Pup. But I can’t promise that my hands won’t accidentally slip down and …” his hands wondered down his side and slid down to grab a handful of Jou’s behind, to which Jou promptly squeaked and jumped, blushing more profusely than before.

Jou pushed him away, shaking his head as he unlocked the front door.

“That’s a bit cold, Pup. Do you really want to kick me out?”

“We have school tomorrow and I haven’t touched the assignment for English yet.” They both knew it was a crappy excuse, but Jou had to think, and that clearly wasn’t possible with Kaiba in the room.

Kaiba sighed, but looked like he resigned himself with the situation. He kissed Jou one last time, pressing the blond to him with his hands around his body, grabbing the luring behind yet again. When the kiss broke and a blushing Jou finally shoved a widely smirking Kaiba out of his door, the apartment suddenly felt a little bit empty when the front door closed.

Jou shook his head to shake the feeling off and looked at his door.

“Fucking pervert.”

He went back into the room and sat on the couch with no intention of writing the English-paper due to tomorrow.

As Jou sat there, he let it dawn upon him what he had just agreed to. If they were dating, should he behave any differently? Would Kaiba? Should he tell Yugi and the others? Should he actively keep it a secret? If he told them, and the whole relationship-thing failed, would they laugh? Would Honda laugh?

He clutched his head. God this was going to give him a head-ache, and no sleep tonight.

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Jou walked into class the next morning with bags under his eyes, a crappy English essay and a crappy excuse involving an English essay to explain his obvious lack of sleep.

When he noticed that Kaiba was sitting quietly at his desk, his heart suddenly sped up. Should he go over and say hello?

When he opened his mouth to say something to Kaiba, the brunette looked up from his book and smirked a bit at him.

“I can see from the bags under your eyes that that essay will get you another D, Mutt. But maybe even without the obvious time problem it would still be a D..”

Jounouchi spluttered and opened his mouth to give the boy a piece of his mind when Honda came sweeping through to his rescue and pulled him away from the CEO to Yugi’s desk.

“Just ignore him man.”

Jounouchi looked thoroughly pissed off and answered in the usual loud manner, but inside he was hurt. Shouldn’t things be different now? Or maybe Kaiba wouldn’t want it to be public knowledge that he was dating someone like him?


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[YES, that was long!... I think?

Thank you SO SO much to EVERYONE who has left a review while my inspiration had abandoned me, they truly helped! You've got no idea how motivating it has been to get reviews throughout the earlier writing-process and WHILE I didn't update. You kept reminding me to write the crap!

I promise to have the next chapter out before.. August? It's exam-time-of-the-year, so I'll be ten feet under in the next month, but maybe I will magically become inspired while I'm supposed to be studying for my exams? Who knows, my brain works in mysterious ways..

This is me being shameless, but I've got another fic in the YGO-realm; "Glass-doll", it is a BakuraRyou and I'd love some oppinions on the writingstyle ^_^ . Please read?

See you guys, hopefully, before too long!]