rate_review Reviews

Be sure to put in a really juicy lemon in there when you finish.

lol. i like the story and found it rather funny when he said yes Joey i like you as a friend too. that was funny and i am looking forward to reading more if put it on alright? just email me or something when the next one comes out, i would really really like to read it! thank you and keep up the good work alright? bye!

glad ur continuing da story and da edited version of da first chappie is great
update soon and keep da gud work up

You know, for the story, it actually wasn't too bad. I can see future in this. Sure there are grammar errors but if you read a really good story that can interest people then sometimes it doesn't matter. Look I'm a writer myself (have been writing for 7 years now) and I know that sometimes criticism is hard to deal with. Especially if you are proud of your story. But if you just see it as a way to improve yourself, you know get rid of the faults, then maybe it won't be so bad. Different are the flamers, they mostly just say your story is bad, that you can't spell, basically insult your writing, and leave it at that. They certainly fail to explain why they think that except that don't like it and that the grammar is off. Those people are best to be ignored and mostly don't know a thing about writing themselves. They just don't like the story and will get you on every single fault they can find. Though I'd wish to strangle them with a telephone cord and knock them senseless with my laptop that's unfortunatly illigal. For advice I'd say maybe you could try to get in the details a bit more to get it a tad longer. And also don't just say they are having a conversation and what they discussed, show the discussion itself. It get's more interesting that way. Also what I found to be very effective is when you leave people in the dark, keep them guessing. Readers wan't to know as much as they can and if you leave things out, like here: who's Joey's crush was, who was helping him, leaving the name Joey out, you name it. If they don't know something, they want to find out. So they will read the next chapter to do so.
As for help, maybe I can do something on that part. You said you had no one to correct the grammar in your story's. Maybe I can do that for you. I'd love to read some more from you if you would like to show it. Well mail me with the answer. Can't wait to read more from you, so I bid you goodbye for now, and I'll read ya later if ya catch my drift

JA JA! so much better ^-^, one thing though how come kaiba and Jou didnt get together? O.o

hmmmm...quite a surprising ending (if thats the ending), but I like it .

Right this is a really dumb Question, however, Is Kaiba going to tell Joey the truth?

EY I want more...this was great. but I didnt Like that Seto didnt like the little puppy back

My, it's such fun to read your reviews and see people insulting me XD Though I do have the odd feeling that some of them didn't read the entire review, or any of the ones by me after that ;P Seriously, if I didn't do it, someone else would've and they would have left a right-out flame.

I'm sad to see it end this way though. I don't very much like involving myself romantically with anyone, so I wouldn't know how it feels to be let down that way. I do hope that you find someone worthy of you in your life; most relationships are only paving the way for you to find "The One". (I agree with one of your other reviewers- quotation marks are fun :D) Prehaps if you feel up to it, you could write a future after the end? If you're feeling upset or anything by the let-down, you could write life after it. I've found that, much like you, replacing my friends and I with characters to live parts of my life is very theraputic. It also helps me see things from all angles, so I can understand what happened better. Of course, that could just be me, seeing as I'm not sure many other people take pleasure in others insulting them o.-

I'm glad you found a Beta, it would've been a shame to see this story wither and die ;-; .:sighs longlingly:. I've always wanted a Beta, but none are compatible with my writing style. One I found was, but she refused to edit for me claiming that she'd ruin it .:mutters:. It already sucked, so I don't see what her problem was.

Yes, I do know that I'm branching off into different subjects now. I don't want to end this review because that means admitting that the story's over, and I'm very happy living in the land of Denial. I've already built myself a hut there ;D I live next to a budgie who thinks he's a tiger.

Dammit, I don't want to leave. I refuse to acknowledge that this is over. I'll keep waiting for updates until I'm an old woman collecting handheld fans.

-Elle
(P.S- Why is it that I always have Mountain Dew when I see an update for this? x.x)

I loved your story please continue, pretty please. AND ITS NOT CRAP. Whoever said it was is an idiot , so don't listen to them it may have bad speling but hey all that's matters is the fact you tried and you did a pretty good job so please continue.