rate_review Reviews

Hey! *pokes you* You didn't mention any M/M/M stuff in the summary, let alone that it was gonna be Seto/Jou/Mokuba. *pokes you again* Grr. Warn me next time. And I'm not so sure this fits into this fic. *sulks* You just threw it off track. *sticks tounge out at you* I still worship you, and this fic though. I am but a humble fan. Who is eagerly awaiting more work on this story, especially some Ryou/Bakura stuff. *hint hint, nudge nudge, pointed look*

Not bad, not bad. I may not be a big fan of threesomes, but this one is good. However, I do feel that Mokuba deserves a lover of his own, (aside from that Duke (Otogi)). Then again, I really like Seto with Joey and tend to prefer no one encroaching on their relationship. *shrugs* Maybe Mokuba can find someone?? I am sure there is an elf for him. *chuckles* Time to brainstorm there. *shrugs* Anyways, please keep up the good work!

I loved the three-some...amazing very well done.
Anyways will can't wait to see what will happen
next and don't mind the short review...It's late
here... Anyways can't wait to see what will happen
between Malik and Marik and the others.

JK: *still holding white orb* do you give in Yami-kun,
You know you can join us if you'd like, *gives innocent,
sweet smile*

That was really good! Very graphic! Although I'm not really keen on the whole threesome idea I still thought it was good but I would have prefered it just to be Joey and Seto but if you like Mokuba, Joey and Seto together then that's ok, I mean it's your story I'm just giving my small point of view. Anyway good writing1 :-) *gives a red-chibi-rose*

Nice chapter. The way they speak is a little funny, but I'm assuming that's just because they're elves. The lemons were good, or at least, well based, my suggestion would be to go back over them a few times (at least once, more if you already do once). You switch tenses, and you need to watch for sentence fragments. Don't be afraid to use commas, or speech to express something. Try to show instead of telling. Focus especially on the last part, it will without fail increase the quality of your writing. I already like your story (I wouldn't bother to review if I didn't), so those're my thoughts on improvements! Good job, and update again soon!

Ah, Yami and Yugi finally have their moment. I hope you update more soon! I love Seto x Jou!

VERY AWESOME! Yami an Yugi had their 'moment' and it was soooo cute! Hurry and update soon

That was great! I'm so happy you put a 'moment' between Yugi and Yami! *squeals with delight*
Keep updating and keep up the good...great work! ^.^ ^_^ ^0^ ^o^
*gives author a chibi-blue-rose and a bunch of Yu-Gi-Oh plushies*

Very good chapter and I love the lemon with Yugi
and Yami. But what did Seto mean when he was
speaking with Joey. Does he have a hidden secret
that only Othar (sp?) and Seto know about. Will it
involve another dragon of the Red-Eyes variety.
Anyways...can't wait to see who's next and will this
story involve any type of mpreg...(I enjoyed it from
your Engulfed trilogy by the way, very skillfully done)

Jadedkatrina: *holds out white magic orb* if you attack
me then Ravenx looses a very good reviewer and then
she'll be angry and take Yugi away...Just let me borrow
him for a little while...

Update soon

Jadedkatrina

Oh my gosh it is so sweet when ti read that part abt them lying around just like a puzzle......i am so glad that things are going so well for them!!!
I am so glade that malik is willing to give a chance to marlik, i hope that malik will be able to let go of his pass soon.
O but best of all is that yugi and yami has finally gotten "closer" hehehehe [i cant help but being a little romantic pervert]

Well done, and as usual i love this fic. I cant wait to read more action between de other couples!!!

hope to read de next chappi soon!!!

bye