Why you shouldn't kill bees

Disclaimer: A bunch of Yu-Gi-Oh! cards and a crappy old videotape is about all I own that's related to the series. And, not even I am stupid enough to expect payment for my writings, so... no need to worry about financial benefits, alright? Be generous and PLEASE don't sue me, all you might get are my cards... and I couldn't live without my baby dragon T_T


AN: This isn't really rated R but rather PG13 (I didn't have that option though)

Beta-ed by Ykarzel and Shadow_Wings (you just gotta love 'em!!!)


Why you shouldn’t kill bees



Jou fell back onto the bed with an exhausted sigh.

He looked at the clock on the wall and couldn’t believe they had yelled at each other only half an hour ago. About something as stupid as Jou accepting Mokuba’s invitation to dinner at the Kaiba mansion.

Then Seto had pushed him into his room, trying to settle the fight without Mokuba getting involved. Jou had stumbled backwards and fallen onto Kaiba’s bed. That was when Seto had done the incredible and kissed him.

And Jou had complied. Who wouldn’t when a long term crush suddenly showed interest?

They had kissed like hungry kids dig into their happy meals. And then it all had happened as if it was a normal occurrence. They had undressed each other and devoured each other’s mouths and then, finally, they had slept with each other. Just like that. And it had been wonderful.

Seto collapsed onto the bed, next to him. Jou moved closer and cradled his head on Seto’s chest; enjoying the sounds of the brunet’s slowly calming heartbeat. He closed his eyes and, with a smile on his lips, relived every second of their lovemaking

He was interrupted by Seto, who asked, with a strange voice, “What do you think you’re doing?”

Jou frowned, opened up his eyes and answered confusedly, “Breathing?”

With a cold voice lacking any emotion Seto ordered calmly, “Breathe somewhere else.”

For a couple of seconds the world seemed to stand still. Jou’s gaze was glued to the spot on the wall that he had been looking at since he opened his eyes. The smile around his lips, however, slowly faded.

He got up, distantly feeling how his now numb body separated from Seto’s warm one, never turning around. Picking up his clothes and putting them back on, Jou couldn’t manage anything but to concentrate on his breathing and force down a mild but strange urge to vomit.

When he was dressed he simply left the room without looking back or saying anything.

In the same manner he went for the huge foyer. On the way he met Mokuba who asked a question. Mokuba’s face seemed worried, but Jou couldn’t bring himself to think about it any further. Jou felt his mouth form an answer and at the same time didn’t even know what he was saying. The words - if that was what came out - all blurred in his head and made no sense to him.

All he knew was that he gave Mokuba a bright smile and even after the boy was gone and Jou had left the house, the smile didn’t seem to disappear.

It was still sticking to his face when he entered his appartment and locked the door behind himself. It also stayed when he closed the curtains and took his shoes off.

He lay down in his bed and pulled the cover over his face, and it was then that the horrible smile turned smoothly into a silent painful cry.

Without making any noise except hushed sobs, he kept the grimace until sleep was merciful enough to claim him.


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School was strange the next day.

Jou felt as if he was watching himself talking to his friends and classmates just like everyday, but he couldn’t hear a thing. Whatever they were talking about - and whatever he was answering - he had no idea what it was. Not that it mattered. Nothing really mattered. He was just there, funtioning. Functioning as best as he could. Sometimes things still function even though they are broken.

And usually people don’t notice. None of his friends did anyway.

When Kaiba turned around a corner and saw the blond teen standing amongst his friends, talking about duel monsters, he was almost glad to see that Jou wasn’t heartbroken or anything about his rude brush off the other day. Kaiba had almost worried.

Of course there was no need to. What had happened yesterday was disturbing, but it didn’t mean anything. After all the two of them couldn’t stand each other. It was good that he had stopped it before it could get any worse. What they needed to do now was get back to their everyday life.

Seto was almost impressed with how Jou managed to do so, with his relaxed features and the usual bored expression he would wear whenever he was on school grounds.

Seto sighed. Alright. He could do just as well.

He composed himself and casually passed the Yugi-Gang, throwing over an indifferent, “Heard someone brought a leash into the lost and found. Guess you lost yours, Mutt?”

Seto immediately noticed Yugi’s reaction, who looked up into Jou’s face, clearly worrying the blond might explode before any of his friends would have a chance of keeping him back. What Seto didn’t see though, was Jou’s reaction. As there was none.

The teen just kept admiring a card Anzu held in her hand.

For a second Kaiba wondered if he might have spoken too quietly but eventually he caught a glimpse of Jou’s friends staring at the blond in utter surprise.

What was he supposed to do now? He couldn’t stop and say it again.

For a second his mind showed him images of Jou yelling things like, “Look at me you arrogant prick. I’m talkin’ to ya!” Ironically, that was just how Seto felt right now. What was going on here? Jou always reacted.

But he didn’t now.

And suddenly Seto noticed that Jou hadn’t either the other evening. “Breathe somewhere else,” he heard himself say. And Jou had obeyed.

Kaiba didn’t show any sign of confusion, of course. He just walked on and turned around the next corner. He stood there, leaning against the cold wall, slowly understanding.

Jou hadn’t even flinched at his words. He hadn’t simply ignored Seto, for in order to ignore someone, you have to know they are there. It felt more like Seto didn’t even exist to Jou anymore.

His heart suddenly hurt as if it was stabbed by something sharp and edgy. The one person he wanted to communicate with the most was just around the corner, and yet he couldn’t have been further away.

Game over. You lose. And unfortunately, in real life, there is no button that reads ‘try again’.


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School was strange the next week.

No matter what interesting excercises the teachers provided, Seto couldn’t concentrate on anything except the blond teen one seat to his left and two rows behind him.

Sometimes, you need to lose something in order to understand how much it meant to you.

Seto could have killed whoever had come up with that idea. What was understanding good for if it came too late? Having to see what you want in front of you every day and at the same time knowing you can’t have it? It was nothing but torture. And the worst part of it was, he deserved it and he knew it.

That was what Seto thought about recently. And it was what Seto thought about when the teacher asked him to read his homework to the class.

He hesitated. He didn’t want to read his essay facing everyone. Especially not while standing there in front of the teacher’s desk, having no other choice than to look at Jou. How was he supposed to bear it?

“Mr. Kaiba, please. We don’t have all morning to wait for you,” the teacher reminded him.

What choice did he have? Seto got up and placed himself in front of the class. Gluing his eyes to the paper he started to read his essay.

“Why you shouldn’t kill bees.” Someone snickered at the title but Seto simply ignored it. Not like he cared.
“It was summer and Nami was eight when she was allowed to play at the river all by herself for the first time. She knew how to swim after all, and she loved playing close to water.

It could have been a wonderful day if there hadn’t been that annoying bee that kept circling her in an irritating fashion.

Nami tried to ignore it for a while but the bee kept humming around her ears and was nervy enough to frequently sit down on Nami’s arms or nose or wherever it could land.

After taking the disturbance for what Nami considered too long, she became aggressive and tried to swat the bee with her shoe. Never succeeding of course, but as a result, making the bee combative as well.

Its bothersome attacks resulted in a weird fight between a screaming girl and an irritated insect. It even tried to sting Nami but she wouldn’t even have noticed, so consuming was her rage.

After an exhausting battle, both of them got rather tired and the bee, narrowly missed by Nami’s shoe, finally fell to the ground, spent from its adventure. Nami watched in surprised interest as the little creature rested on a stone right next to her feet.

Scientific curiosity made her bend down and watch it more closely. Noticing the bee didn’t look as dangerous or annoying as it had before anymore, Nami almost felt amused by it. Carefully she reached into her pocket, pulling out the empty wrapping of a piece of candy. She cautiously placed it in front of the tiny insect and observed how the bee interestedly moved its antennas.

The little creature sensed the sugar right away and climbed onto the silvery wrapping, happily dining on its unexpected meal. With joy, Nami could see how much calmer the bee was now. She stood up to look at it from another perspective, like any good scientist would.

Standing so high above the little bee gave Nami a strange feeling. She remebered being bothered by the insect and that insects were annoying little beasts, so she did what Nami thought she had to do. Without a sound the bee was squashed under the sole of her shoe.”

Seto paused for a second, glancing at Jou out of the corner of his eyes. He couldn’t help looking at him if only for a glimpse. When Seto looked down onto his piece of paper again, he had already seen everything he needed to. Jou sat in his chair, with his arms over his desk and his head resting on his arms. He was stairing out the window, obviously daydreaming.

What had he expected? Jou never even paid attention when the teacher talked to them. Why would he now that it was Seto speaking?

Seto did what the teacher was waiting for and finished, trying to not show his feelings,
“The weather had been strange all day, but that was the moment when it finally started to rain.
Nami watched indifferently as the rain swept the bee down into the river. Its little body was light; she could still see it being carried away by the water like a tiny boat in the ocean.

She followed it with her eyes for a while until the river made a turn and the bee disappeared out of her view.

Only then, a sharp pain emerged in her palm, Nami looked down onto her hand and suddenly noticed she had been stung. Tears started running down her face. Not because it hurt.

She had killed something Nami now knew she would miss forever.”

With that Seto walked back to his chair, managing to not look into anyone’s face now.

“Well, Mr. Kaiba. That was certainly different from your usual style. It was very nice, of course,” he heard the teacher speak with a feigned soft voice, “ but you do remember that you were supposed to write an essay about your own personal experience, don’t you?”

When Seto didn’t answer, she continued, “And, aside from that, how can a person not notice that he or she gets stung by a bee? And who would ever miss it? It’s just a bee anyway. That’s not reasonable.”

“Reasonable?” Kaiba asked quietly, “Of course it’s not.”

The teacher sighed at Seto’s passiveness.

“Well, this is below your abilities. And you know that,” she said briskly as she shuffled the papers on her desk, “Considering this, and the fact that you didn’t do the assignment I gave, I'm afraid I'm going to have to give you a zero. You could have done so much better.”

Kaiba simply shrugged. Yes. He could have. But he couldn’t change it anymore.

Just before Kaiba could go back to the mental place where he used to sit and endure until the day was over, he heard a chair being moved some rows behind him and someone walking up to the front.

It was Jou who went casually to the door.

“And where are you going, Mr. Jounouchi?” the teacher asked. “

Jou simply shrugged and said, “I don’t know, maybe I’m gonna go out into the school yard; sit under a tree or something.”

The teacher frowned dangerously and it was clear that Jou had better not mess with her.

“And what makes you think you can just leave my class?” she asked.

“Well,” Jou said frankly, “you’re a moron.”

The teacher paled and her knuckles turned white as she obviously fought with the decision to yell at Jou or keep reserved. She finally tried to settle for the latter one and muttered calmly but with a dangerous shiver in her voice, “And why is that?”

“It wasn’t just a bee,” Jou explained sincerely, “It’s a symbol.”

He once more turned for the door but before leaving he faced Seto. With a slight smile on his face Jou said softly, “And it’s not dead.”

He stepped out into the hallway, leaving Seto behind to stare at it, and try to digest the news.

After waiting four heartbeats to calm himself, Seto got up as well and also headed for the door.

The teacher, who had sat down in her chair muttering symbol? He would have had to make that clear! stood up again. “And what is your excuse now?”

Seto looked at her, biting his lip, “You really are a moron.”


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He found Jou in the schoolyard, under a tree, just like the blond had said. Stepping up to him Seto mentally went over the appology he had tried to come up with since leaving the classroom.

“Jou, I’m…” he started but was interrupted by Jou who stood up and put his fingers over Seto’s lips.

“I know,” the blond simply said. Then he kissed Kaiba.

Jou closed the space between them and placed his head on Seto’s chest.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Seto said after a while, but he wasn’t really asking.

Jou looked up to him and answered, “Breathing.”

He hesitated for a couple of seconds and then asked quietly, “Do you want me to breathe somewhere else?”

Kaiba shook his head and hugged Jou tightly, “Breathe here. With me. And kick my ass if I ever dare try to say anything else.”






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