To Find a Hidden Love

Title: To Find a Hidden Love: 6/11

Author: Daisey

Rating: R

Pairing: Atem/Katenen (Yami/Jou); mention of Yugi/Katenen (Yugi/Jou)

Beta: Akuchan **hugs**

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh or its characters, just a few keepsakes, cards, and daydreams that are precious to me... (Not to mention VHS tapes, DVD's, manga... ^__^ )

Summary: A secret love affair is exposed upon the death of Atem's brother leaving the god-king to deal with not only the burden of his own grief but that of the lover's as well.

A/N: I have included some Egyptian/Arabic words in the text to add to the feel to the story; explanations/definitions will be listed at the end of the chapter.

Also, since this marks the half way point of this story, I have included some ‘thank you’s’ at the bottom.

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The vast throne room was filled with people. The courtiers of Atem's city, in their sheer, white linen robes, sat closest to the dais on padded and gilded stools, the only group privileged enough to actually be permitted to sit. Next came the regiment of priests in their short, white kilts and animal skin robes, followed by the palace guard in their heavy, beige tunics. From there, the group became mingled; palace workers and servants in their rough cotton garb stood packed together, leaving only a sliver of space at the back of the room for the beggars that sat at Atem's gates to sneak in, hoping to catch a glimpse of their king. It was the thirtieth day of Mesore, a cause of celebration for ~all~ Egyptians, but for none more so than Atem-Nisu; it was the day that his father Ra, at the beginning, had risen from the primeval deep in the form of the sun egg and had begun the line of the kings and the worshipping of the sun.

Usually the god-king would ride through the city, giving the commoners a chance to show their adulation, and greeting his people en masse once he reached the large, public temple of Ra. However, this year, because of the god-king's predicament, the decree had been passed down to the people, stating that, whilst Atem would still participate in the customary procession, he would be returning to his home for a small, private worship ceremony, as should his subjects. The public had accepted the proclamation, automatically assuming that it was due to the passing of Yugi Re-Pat just over eleven months hence, and that the Son of Ra was still privately mourning for his Sen- just as Seth had predicted they would. Obviously, it had been impossible to hide Atem's malady from ~everyone~; the majority of the palace staff knew, as did most of Atem's courtiers. But, whilst it was true that Atem was the picture of health otherwise, the less people that knew of the god-king's affliction the better. The loss of his voice and the need to speak through another would be considered a weakness, and one to exploit should news of it reach the wrong ears.

Herihor stood to the left of the dais in the spot that had become his post, nervously clenching and unclenching his hands, and fervently wishing that Anhay had been able to attend. The excitement in the room was palpable, and ~not~ just because of the feast. Everyone present was aware, either through personal experience or through word of mouth, that Katenen, consort to the deceased Yugi Re-Pat, had been serving as Atem's voice, and that the reading of the verses of Ra, normally carried out by the god-king, would be performed by him in his first public speech. However, Anhay was currently under confinement, having found out near seven months ago that she was with child.

The stocky brunette couldn't help but smile as he recalled the way his ~very~ pregnant wife had had a ~very~ childish tantrum when Herihor had not only refused to let her breach social protocol and attend, but had refused to permit her usage of one of the hidden tunnels that led to the throne room so that she might listen unseen. Truth be told, he wouldn't have minded at ~all~ for Anhay to be seen, so proud he was of the pregnancy. But he didn't want to add to Katenen's already nervous state by asking for dispensation, and there was no ~way~ that he was going to permit his Merwet to endanger herself and the baby by standing hunched over in a dank, dirty passageway.

Herihor was drawn out of his musings when the occupants of the room simultaneously fell silent. Suddenly, the elaborate doors opened, and he found himself holding his breath as first Atem, then Seth, and finally Katenen entered the room and mounted the dais. The guard felt a surge of pride as he watched his friend and master climb the steps with just as much grace and regality as his King and High Priest. Katenen had come a long way since that day just over nine months ago when Seth had made his proclamation but, whilst the blonde was carrying himself nearly as elegantly and speaking nearly as eloquently as Atem Nisu, the journey to reach that point had not been an easy one.

As Herihor had watched Atem pass his blessing to Katenen on the day of Yugi Re-pat's interment, a flicker of hope had shone through the doubt that had darkened his mind ever since learning of the need for the two strong-willed men to work together. And, when the god-king had permitted the heart-weary blonde another two days rest before returning to his duties, Herihor and Seth ~both~ had felt their hearts grow lighter. However, when Katenen had returned to continue his tutelage, the hostility had flared with a vengeance. Neither man was willing to let go of the hurt that they carried and the anger that each felt toward the other because of it, Katenen blaming Atem for Yugi's passing, and Atem blaming Katenen for his feelings of guilt and weakness.

As each day had passed, the outbursts had increased in intensity until, after the third day of the guards rushing into the throne room at the sounds of Katenen's heated voice echoing through the hallways, Seth had once again intervened. Katenen had taken his scolding from the High Priest humbly, his tawny eyes dropping their gaze to the floor as he apologized meekly for his failure to adhere to the gods' commands and promised to put forth more effort.

Herihor smirked as he recalled how Seth had then turned to the smugly silent Atem, his sapphire eyes gleaming with knowledge as he smirked down at his cousin with a smugness all of his own. "And don't think that, because you have no voice, you also have no blame in the matter," the tall brunette had stated, his smirk widening as his cousin's smugness tellingly began to wane. "The gods are not blind to your part in these confrontations, Atem Nisu, so do ~not~ think that Katenen will be held fully responsible should Egypt fall due to your stubbornness. Besides," Seth had retorted, even as he'd turned to leave, "I know full well how infuriating you can be, whether you can speak, or no."

Both men had paled upon hearing Seth's not so subtle reminder as to why they were working together in the first place and, after that, the two had held their tongues in public and had begun to work together, for Egypt's sake, if for nothing else- a point which Katenen had heatedly continued to make as he'd paced back and forth in furious agitation upon returning home each evening. Herihor and Anhay had spent several evenings lending a sympathetic ear to their friend as he'd ranted on about how `He' refused to communicate directly with the blonde, opting instead to sign and lip-speak to one of his personal servants and then having the servant verbalize the god-king's commands to Katenen, or how, despite the fact that Seth had stood in front of `Him' and had plainly stated that the frustrated blonde's diction and elocution were nearly as perfect as his own, as soon as the High Priest would leave, Atem would force Katenen to iterate the very scroll that Seth had just complimented him on. But the stubborn blonde had soon put a stop to that.

The stocky brunette's smirk widened as he thought back on the day that Katenen had strode into the throne room and, for the first time since being granted it, had used his authority as a royal consort and had commanded everyone, including Herihor, out of the room, save Atem and himself. The fire that had flashed in Katenen's eyes had silenced any protests from Atem's servant before they could be made and, before the mute god-king could refute the command, the irate and obstinate ruler was left alone, save for an equally irate and obstinate blonde.

It had been Herihor's turn to pace that day as hour after hour had passed without his master's return. By the time dusk had fallen there had still been no word and, nearly out of his mind with curiosity and concern, Herihor had made his way to the throne room, reaching the ornate doors just in time to see Katenen come storming out, tears of fury and frustration welling in his eyes. The blonde had stopped short upon seeing his friend, and had tried to gain some semblance of control, but had failed miserably.

"I quit! I give up!" he had seethed, eyes blinking rapidly against the tears that had threatened. "He won't even look at me, let alone sign to me. The man's as stubborn as a field ass; there's just no reasoning with him. I'm going to find Seth right now; Egypt be damned!" By then, Herihor had become quite used to his master’s hot head and sharp tongue, and the guard had just assumed that the blonde was blowing off steam… until he'd noticed the hallway that Katenen had taken. Instantly Herihor had grabbed his friend's arm and had begun to plead for the slender man to reconsider, when he had been interrupted by a faint cry of alarm. Startled, both men had turned toward the source of the disturbance, and had been shocked to see a messenger from Philae, one of the border cities that sat between Egypt and Nubia further down the Nile. Herihor's pleas all but forgotten, they'd rushed to the exhausted man's aid, paling as the gasped out words `the Nubians' had fallen on their ears. Their response had been instantaneous; taking either side of the messenger, they'd helped him to his feet, and had promptly taken him back to the throne room.

Upon reaching the doors, Katenen had unceremoniously thrust them open, causing Atem to rise to his feet. Thoughts of whatever had caused the dejected expression to settle on his elegant features fled as first shock, and then anger flashed through the god- king's expressive eyes. Immediately, Atem's hand had reached for the pull rope with the intent of summoning his servant, but Katenen, desperate not to let their differences show in front of the courier, had silenced him with a bow and the surprisingly respectful words: "If it pleases my King, there is neither the time nor the need to summon an interpreter; the man is near faint with exhaustion, and he brings you word of the Nubians."

Atem had pulled back his hand as if burnt, though whether from shock at Katenen's words or the humbleness with which they'd been spoken, Herihor to this day wasn't certain. However, what he ~was~ certain of was that, as his king and his master had worked through that night almost eight months ago to successfully thwart the Nubians' latest threat, a barrier had been broken and a tenuous peace had been established.

Herihor sighed inwardly and pulled his mind back to the present as the timbrils began to sound, ushering in Atem's harem to perform their dance to Ra. As the dancers approached the dais, the guard noticed both the unsurprising look of abject boredom on the god- king's face, and the slightly more surprising way that Katenen's back stiffened at the appearance of the scantily clad women as they moved forward one by one to coyly dance for their master in the hopes of gaining his favour. Curiosity piqued by his friend's odd behavior, Herihor kept his eyes trained on the blonde, noting the way that the man visibly relaxed as the women exited the throne room, not one of them having been pulled to the dais by the object of their desire.

`Tenuous peace…' Herihor smirked to himself. `Maybe Seth’s vision wasn't as farfetched as it had seemed.' Suddenly the timbrils stilled, drawing the brunette out of his musings as the entire room's focus shifted to the three men on the dais, more particularly, the breathtaking blonde who took a step forward and softly began to speak.

~O Ra, you were high on the height, you rose up as the bnbn-stone in the Mansion of the bn-bird in On, you spat out Shu, you spit out Tefnut, and you set your arms about them as the arms of a ka-symbol, that your essence might be in them~

As the song of praise grew in its intensity, so did Katenen's voice, the beauty of the words magnified by the overwhelming devotion with which they were being canted. When the verses came to an end, Herihor was not surprised to find his cheeks dampened with tears, knowing that they had fallen as much out of love for and pride in his master as out of respect for and praise to his god.

Apparently, he wasn't the only one so affected; the entire room stood as if stunned, from the filthiest beggar at the back of the room, to Atem-Nisu himself. And, as Katenen lowered his eyes and stepped back to make room for Seth to bless and seal the sacred scroll from which the blonde had been canting, Herihor couldn't help but notice the lust for his master that shone as abjectly in Atem's eyes as the boredom had for the women just moments ago.

**tbc**

Translations:

Mesore: Egyptian month that runs from June 14- July 13 on our calendar

http://showcase.netins.net/web/ankh/calendar1.html- website where I found the information on the Egyptian months and holidays

Sen: Brother

Merwet- Love

Nisu- King

http://www.touregypt.net/featurestories/creation.html- the website where I found the verse to Ra that I have Katenen quoting. I have no clue as to if the verse was used in a celebratory fashion or not, but felt that it was fitting...

~~Thank You’s~~

MaggieMay: **squees and glomps in return** Yay! My first review! **grins** Thank you so much for your kind words in regards to my little story. I know you say that I’m your ‘hero’, but I still ~so~ don’t see it. You and your stories are brilliant, and I am honoured that you speak so highly of me and mine.

Koalared: **grins** guess what… so am I! As a matter of fact, that's what almost ~all~ of my other fics are.**laughs** I can’t ~tell~ you how much I angsted over my first non S/J lemon. **blushes sheepishly** I actually even went through a stage where I felt like I was making Jou cheat against his Dragon! But, thanks to good friends, and my own bull headedness, I worked past it, and I am ~so~ glad I did. This story truly holds a special place in my heart, and I’m glad that you’re enjoying it as well.

Whosjeebus: **big smile** and, speaking of one of those good friends; **GLOMP** I couldn’t have done this without you, you know that, ne? **grins** just one question… why the pit of voles? =D

Rroselavy: **smiles and hugs** another review that means a ton to me; I am ~such~ a fan of your stories. Well Mannered Puppy has become a part of my monthly reading list, and I’m totally hooked on ‘In the Name of Love’. I’m glad you’re enjoying Hidden Love, and yes; the healing begins **grins** right about now, actually... ;D

Katsuko: **hugs** I can never thank you enough for your support and kind words, and I can honestly say that, without your wonderful Yami/Yuugi/Jou Yahoo! list, Hidden Love would never have taken flight. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again; it pleases/astounds me to no end that you have taken such a liking to my story, and I can only hope that anything else I write for your wonderful haven has the same effect.

Anon: **smiles** thank you so much for taking the time to review. I hope you continue to enjoy the story, and I’ll continue to update as soon as I can.

KJ: **blushes and grins** Thank you so much… I’m glad you’re enjoying it. And I agree, there are too few Yami/Jou fics out there. But, **grins conspiratorially** I’m hoping to rectify that… now if I can just get time to cooperate with me...

Puppylove: **smiles** Thank you very much; and I’m glad you think I’m doing a good job. I hope you continue to enjoy.