Submission

Chapter 6

Kaiba had been little of anything except surprised when Yami, Yugi and Joey had turned up on his doorstep and asked for security measures to be installed at the Turtle Games Shop. But the elder brother had a camera installed the same day and hired someone to stay in the shop through opening hours to ensure that no one tried anything, although what that ‘anything’ might be he was kept unawares of. Not that the billionaire pushed the matter; one glance at Joey and Yugi’s faces told him that his ignorance was required and would be forced if necessary.

The urge to protect was now stronger than ever.

Yugi had suggested they go to the police but Yami had protested so vehemently against that idea that it was dropped without protest. Joey had offered to speak to someone without Yami’s knowledge but Yugi told him not to; sneaking behind Yami’s back to do things he didn’t want them to would only betray his trust, something that would likely be impossible to get back again with him in such an emotional state.

At least the nightmares were starting to stop, the guilt that Yami felt over his refusal of Kresha’s advances ebbing away and leaving his spirit lighter. Now the only issue was the event itself but that was being put behind him gradually. It wasn’t easy, the facade he put on to Yugi to assure him that it was a simple matter deceiving the boy well, but behind closed doors he still struggled.

Yugi couldn’t know that he was still hurting, still felt sick, still saw it behind his eyes some nights. His Hikari was already sick with worry over him, and if his ignorance of his true state was what he needed, then so be it. Joey had scolded him when he had noticed what Yami was doing; the affirmative gestures and brave smiles seen for what they were in his eyes. False. He had promised Yugi to stop lying to him, but Yami protested the whe wasn’t lying to him, merely protecting him.

Joey had given him a hard look to stop him from even starting down *that* path, and then dropping the matter with both holding their peace.

Kresha hadn’t shown up in the shop again and after a few admittedly embarrassing back-peddles, Yami was now back working out front. He still preferred the dark, secure store room to the lit, exposed shop, but he was getting better and no longer feeling the urge to run or hyperventilate whilst he was there.

The guard was on watch as usual today, an impressively built young man by the name of Kadu who sat in a high stool-chair by the entrance, cool eyes tracking customer’s movements without unnerving them. Yugi had pulled him aside when Kaiba had hired him, something no-one could fathom the reason for yet, and given a description of the man Yami had described to him. He had also said to watch Yami carefully as he might not alert anyone for help if Kresha did walk in, so his body language would need to be monitored whilst he was out in the shop.

Today was glorious in terms of weather and for the first time in a long while Yami actually got up and started the day well-rested, no nightmares coming all night and his body responding well to the many hours of sleep. Today he had promised himself that he was going to stay out in the front of the shop all day, if anything just to prove to himself that he was safe there and didn’t have to worry.

Yugi was overwhelmingly pleased when he announced his plans, giving his Dark a big hug before scurrying out to check that the shelves were full so that Yami didn’t have to worry about restocking them. Whilst he darted back and forth out of the store-room Yami made his way into the shop, nodding politely to Kadu who had just taken his post.

As Yami walked he could feel the gentle shift of the knife down the small of his back, the hilt running up under his jacket and the lapels of the material hanging down so that the weapon was completely hidden against his body. He knew that Yugi and Joey would be less than pleased with him if they knew that he was carrying a blade around with him, particularly given the state of his forearms. But he needed to. He felt more, secure, with it there.

He had found that if he had to actually search for a blade when that irresistible urge swelled through his being, when the scars itched at him, a kind of desperation grew and he did more damage to himself when he had gotten hold of something to use. Its’ presence was a comfort to him, something that he felt he direly needed now.

Yugi wouldn’t be able to understand why the craving was still there; he would have believed that he would instantly recover after the confessions and assurances made six days ago, but nothing was ever that simple. There would be far fewer problems in the world if things were as clean-cut as that. But they weren’t.

So he kept the knife with him. It was a pretty thing; a sculptured hilt and an elegant blade with a small, swirling design engraved from the base winding up to the tip. Yami was quite sure that neither Joey nor his Hikari would be able to appreciate the beauty of the weapon in the same way that he did; the smoothness of the blade and the way in which it reflected things as they were, rather than smearing the reflection and returning it as a distortion.

Moving around the perimeter of the shop to assure himself that there was nothing in the hidden corners that could be considered a threat was present, Yami paused at the open door. It was open, something that was usual in most shops but something that he didn’t want in this one. He would rather have the door open when a customer walked in so that his attention would be gained, allowing him to monitor the newcomer despite it being Kadu’s function here.

His eyes on his hand as it reached for the handle, Yami didn’t notice the other person until the shadow fell over his form. His breath catching in his throat in surprise, he forced his body to recede from its tense state and dragged his eyes up to greet whoever was trying to get by him.

His body froze entirely with his hand still on the door when he did look up though, black orbs meeting crimson and sending ice down his spine and into his belly. Snapping out of the sheer terror quickly, Yami clenched his fingers around the door-handle and jerked it forward, hoping to hit Kresha before he had the chance to do anything.

Too little too late though, for a thick boot wedged itself against the base of the door preventing an impact and his free hands snapped out and grabbed Yami’s upper arms. Dragging him outside before Kadu could reach them, Kresha pulled the small form backwards and into the waiting car, kicking the door shut behind them and bracing himself against the seat as the engine roared to life and surged the vehicle forward.

He silently mused that that had been a lot easier than he expected, and looking down at the trembling form partially sprawled across his lap he knew that everything that was to follow would be relatively simple too. With the teen already broken, submission wouldn’t be problematic.

For his part Yami could only stare up at the broader man, his stomach squirming at the thin smile that graced his features as he looked down on him. There was only fear now; no anger, no resentment, just pure fear. And it was this unyielding terror that kept him still, that prevented his muscles from doing little more than twitching as thick fingers ran over his skin.

There was an underlying feeling of relief in that Yugi was safe; his Hikari was not in danger at all now that Kresha had him. He on the other hand wasn’t sure that he could survive another onslaught at his captor’s hands.

****

Yami was slammed out of the dazed state that his mind had receded into when he hit the floor, his breath coming in short pants as he remained motionless. Hearing a barklauglaughter behind him before the door to the room shut, he risked sitting up as soon as his ribs would allow it. ‘Oh Ra no. Not here. Anywhere but here...’

It was the same room right down to the last stick of furniture. Kresha probably thought that is was ironic. Yami thought that he’d been thrust through the Gates to Hell. Shaking his head in absent denial he shoved himself backwards against the wall away from the bed. Eyes darting around the room for an escape and finding none, he turned his gaze to the door handle, which seemed a mile above him now.

Reaching up a slender hand he wasn’t surprised to find it locked, although the wave of despair and hopelessness that surged through him then made him glad that he was already on the floor for it would have surely sent him to his knees.

A thought occurred to him and he thrust his hand behind him, his eyes closing with relief when he felt the hilt of his dagger still present against his spine. Drawing the weapon out, he twisted until he was on his knees facing the door and drove the blade between the wood and the wall. He honestly had no idea of how to do this; he had never been put in a position to even try before. Twisting the blade as much as the space of the gap would allow did nothing, nor did moving the blade up and around the slot of metal running into the wall.

Grinding his teeth after fruitless minutes Yami admitted to himself that this avenue wasn’t going to get him anywhere. Glancing around the room in what could only be described as a desperate manner only made him feel worse and he sank back down against the wall. Bringing his knees to his chest and his fists to his temples, he forced his mind to cease its frantic thoughts and focus on a way to get out.

‘But should I get out?’ a quiet little voice in the back of his mind asked. ‘If I get out then Kresha will only come for me again, and that would endanger Yugi. He is safe and I am here. Why should I remain?’

In answer to the questions he absently moved his hand over his shirt to touch the scar on the juncture between his neck and shoulder through the material. ‘Because I don’t want him touching me.’

Sighing and slamming his head back against the wall, Yami clenched his eyes closed and concentrated on bringing his breathing back to something resembling normalcy. It was in the silence of his mind as he focused on inhaling slowly and smoothly that he realised that he had put his mental barriers up again. The action was entirely instinctual; unfortunately he needed to bring them down consciously lest they remain in place, isolating his mind from his Hikari’s. Yugi was likely frantic by now.

Bombarded the millisecond that the bond was reopened, Yami took a few seconds to gather his thoughts before insisting that Yugi speak in sentences. He heard footsteps in the corridor outside and shuffled infront of the door, leaning his weight against the wood and bracing his heels into the floor infront of him.

//Aibou, are you alright? Where are you?//

//I’m looking for you! Where are you? Kadu said that-//

Yami interrupted him when the key could be heard going into the lock above his head. //Aibou, Kresha has me. You can’t come for me; promise me you won’t.//

He could feel Yugi’s confusion mingled with fear now, his arms tightening around himself as the door-handle was turned and the wood pressed into his back. Straightening his legs slightly he was able to close it again and he clenched his eyes shut when he heard an amused laugh through the door.

//Yami you can’t mean that! I can feel you-you’re scared. Tell me where you are!// Yugi demanded in his mind, anger leaking into the tone with desperation. All the emotions slamming into him along with his own was starting to make Yami feel lightheaded.

And still Kresha pushed at the door, not using as much force as he could have but enough for Yami to have to use considerable force to keep it shut. Evidently he was enjoying toying with him in this manner. But not for long though.

Yami felt the door close entirely behind him and he let out a breath believing that Kresha had left him for now. He was sadly mistaken for the door was suddenly rammed against which sent it flying open, the teen being forced away several feet and landing hard on his hands and knees.

The shields went right back up again when Kresha strode confidently into the room, smirking down at the sprawled teen with amusement before reaching out a hand to him. Frowning slightly in annoyance when Yami jerked back he snapped his hand out and lifted his lighter weight rather roughly from the floor by his arm, holding him in place on his feet. Shoving him back to the bed he turned his attention back to the door and locked it with the key from his pocket.

The mattress had slammed into the back of his thighs when he was forced back, leaving Yami partially sat on the bed, fists clenched and eyes of fire watching Kresha’s every movement. Dark eyes didn’t even meet his as his form was inspected with an oily smile, the older man striding around the side of the bed and roughly opening the drawer on the side table. Cursing loudly at something, he kicked the wooden cabinet closed and stormed back out of the room, the click of the door locking leaving Yami with absolutely no illusions of escape.

Feeling a desperate clawing at his shields, an intense struggle to beat his barriers that Yami did not think Yugi had the mental strength for, Yami brought them back down and flopped back against the bed with his eyes closed as he listened.

//Yami? What happened? Are you alright?//

The Game King blinked open his eyes slowly when he felt the hilt of his knife pressing into his spine, the metal rim having worked its way between two vertebrae to be oddly comfortable at the same time as dully annoying. Reaching his hand behind and beneath him on the bed, he brought the blade out and held it above him, the solution to this entire thing suddenly seeming insanely simple.

//I’m alright Yugi. I’m going to fix this myself./

The calm tones of his voice obviously terrified his Hikari more than the fact that he was in Kresha’s possession for a wave of uncertainty as well as fear crashed over him.

//What do you mean? Look, Kaiba, Joey and I are coming over to the house now. We’re nearly there.//

//How’d you know I was here?// Yami sent back, oddly disconnected from the conversation and only idly interested in the answer. His attention was focussed far more intently on the blade above him, the dim light playing across its sleek surface in what could only be described as an inviting manner.

//I guessed. It’s the best we could do. Just hold on, alright?//

//You won’t get in. Not in time anyway.// There was a lot of certainty in those words, not from despair but from logic. Yami had lived long enough to learn not to believe in false hopes; he could accept the truth of circumstances despite how painful that often was.

//We have to try Yami! I’m not going to leave you!//

Sitting up now on the edge of the bed with the knife in his lap Yami cast his eyes towards the door, still closed and standing silently. Glancing down at his forearms, the soft flesh hidden by the long sleeves of his jacket, he tipped his head to the side and smiled slightly. He knew for a fact that this weapon would do nothing against Kresha. Even if he were to wound or even kill him he wouldn’t be able to leave the mansion covered in blood, which he would be, not with all the guards he had seen coming in around.

“I’m almost dead inside anyway and I know I won’t survive it again,” he reasoned softly, his other hand rising to toy with the tip of the blade as he held it lightly.

//Yami? Don’t think that. We’re nearly there, alright? We can see the house now.// That instruction was tearful. Yami had overlooked the fact that Yugi could hear his words as well as his thoughts when the bond between them was open.

//You won’t make it,// Yami replied softly whilst using the blade to slice open the material of his jacket to expose his right forearm. He twitched slightly when the cool, crisp air brushed over the suddenly bare skin before moving onto his other arm.

//Stop it Yami! It’s cowardice!//

Every shield had been dropped now as the Game King fell into a disconnected state, his mind set on only one thing and entirely at ease with what he was doing. Complete acceptance. His Hikari’s opinion didn’t matter anymore. Not regarding this. He had no idea.

//It’s a correction. It should be this way anyway. Aibou, you know what I think of you and feel...// Proclamations of love and friendship seemed like a really stupid idea right then. Why say what was already known?

//I know.// A mental whisper. Yami knew that Yugi was still going to try to come for him, but that was of little concern now. Almost irrelevant actually. He sensed that Yugi was striving to collect words together to say more; encouragement to stop, a shout for being weak, pleas to consider what he was doing, hell, even false hope. Yami didn’t know or even wish to speculate.

The attempts to force emotions into words ceased abruptly when the blade bit into the flesh at the base of his hand.

Distantly feeling Yugi instinctively raise a shield against the pain, Yami watched with mild fascination as he drew the metal up slowly until the thin red line had sliced through the other scars and barely-healed wounds before stopping at the inside of his elbow.

The shield was dropped slightly after a second; apparently Yugi wanted to face his own demise with him which Yami found oddly endearing and certainly brave. A few more pleas to stop but the damage was done and then the bond fell quiet as Yugi obviously began attempting entrance into the building with Kaiba and Joey.

Hands remarkably still, Yami transferred the hilt to the other hand and repeated the process before placing the bloodied knife on the mattress and watching the warm fluid spill over his arms. Winding down around his knees, a few drops of it spattered on the floor as the material of his trousers absorbed the rest.

A delightful feeling of lightheadedness washed over him, slightly nauseating after a few seconds but he ignored it and allowed his muscles to fall slack, his eyes staring at the curiously stained ceiling now. ‘How is that stained? There must be water pipes inside the plaster. A peculiar shade too. How is that?’

‘It’s funny what the mind starts thinking when drifting’, Yami mused with amusement as his eyesight dimmed, hearing himself and taking a moment to wonder at the peculiarity of those thoughts. ‘So much like those absences.’

He remembered one absence where he had stared through the long, thin leaves of a plant for a good twenty minutes at the least, his mind captivated by the streaks of green and the crimson lining. Then Joey had started trying different things to bring him back to the world of the aware and the plant had gone away.

Feeling oddly blissful aside from the stinging in his arms, Yami sluggishly sent a few words along the darkening bond before closing his eyes entirely, not planning to open them again any time soon.

//I do love you Aibou and I’m proud of what you’ve become. Look after Joey for me and tell him the same.//

****