Unbreak My Heart

Author’s Note: Another chapter and a closer look at the thoughts of one of the hikaris. This is somewhat angsty and watch out because things will get quite a bit worse for our favorite three before they get some relief. A huge THANK YOU to Draconyx for proofing this for me. That’ll teach me to slow down and not write when angry, eh? Thank you to Rubi and Silvershadowfire for those sweet reviews. Again, the lemony part will be coming soon. Thanks for staying with me!

Disclaimer: I don’t own YuGiOh. I really wish I did thought because it would mean that I’m a creative genius and could also change things around to the way I wanted. That and I could play as much as I wanted. Hehe…

Chapter Four: Kaleidoscope

Yugi sat on the corner of his bed, staring blankly at the wall across from him. He’d finished choking back the breakfast that Grandpa had made for him this morning and was now trying to find a way out of the mess that was his mind. Emotions ran rampant through his heart, mind and soul, and it was about to send him into overload. It was as if every emotion had been forced into a kaleidoscope and each second, a new pattern was formed.

Pain. For some reason, it felt as if someone had ripped out his heart and had tried to convince his body to continue functioning without it. Every breath he drew, every thought that passed through his mind, every little thing seemed to set the pain aflame even worse. There was no escaping from it. It encompassed his mind and was nearly driving him mad.

Loneliness. He felt so alone, both physically, mentally, and spiritually. The lack of his other was not helping him to stabilize himself. For the first time since he’d completed that puzzle, he was truly alone and the young duelist wasn’t sure he would be able to bounce back.

Sadness. How much time would be spent feeling so bad? How many tears had he swallowed back or released into his pillow, crying so that his grandfather would not hear him? How long would he wallow in this darkness before the light came back again? Would he ever be the cheerful person that everyone seemed to think he was? As it was, Yugi knew that he would never be able to smile again. There simply was nothing to smile for.

Anger. Such a horrible, burning, all consuming rage filled him. He’d never felt like this before. He’d never been this angry before, not during the trials he’d faced with his other and his friends. The anger made his slender limbs shake uncontrollably and set the tear filled amethyst eyes to shining with an inner fire that was almost frightening to see. If Yami were to see him now, he would not recognize his young partner, as the duelist had never been this furious before.

A voice broke the stillness of the room for the first time since Yugi had returned to Japan. The voice, usually cheerful, was now flat and lifeless. The gentle tones were rough and unfamiliar to his own ears.

“Alone. You left me all alone here. No warmth, no joy. I am nothing now. You left me alone.”

Rage seemed to spike, and the duelist grabbed the first thing he could reach. Within seconds, the alarm clock shattered into pieces against the wall. At that release of anger, Yugi grabbed everything he could get his hands on and let the items fly.

Downstairs, an exhausted Ryou and Marik were the first to arrive. Grandpa had just let them in when the loud sound was heard.

“Was that what I think it was?”

Grandpa slowly nodded his head as he answered Marik’s question. His voice was quiet and reflected his concern for his absent grandson.

“That’s Yugi. I was waiting for something like this to happen. He’s been too quiet since he got home. Given the depth of the bond he had between him and Yami, I didn’t think he would be able to hold it in for so long. He’s been isolating himself since he got home yesterday and hasn’t said a word either. I saw him for about ten minutes for breakfast before he went back to his room.”

The two hikaris shared a look before going up the stairs to find their friend. As they approached the door, they heard something else being broken and quite a bit of heated muttering that was going on behind the door. Without knocking, Marik opened the bedroom door and the two friends paused, watching as their fellow hikari continued venting his rage.

Items were thrown across the room, shattering upon impact, creating a mess that was so untypical for their friend. What made everything worse were the words that Yugi was now screaming.

“You left me alone! How could you do that after you promised me? I’m all alone again! You promised, Yami! You promised!”

Ryou couldn’t take it anymore and rushed to his friend’s side, gently hugging him so that his arms were firmly pinned down by his side. Yugi fought for a moment as his rage refused to let him go but as it finally subsided beneath the gentle caring of his friend, whatever strength he had left him.

The white haired teenager didn’t let him go as the smaller duelist collapsed to the floor. He went down with him, making sure that Yugi would stay close to him. Marik knelt beside them, running his hand through the messy tri-colored hair. Both of them murmured reassurances, hoping to reach their grieving friend.

“It’s all right, Yugi. I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but you’re not alone. We’re with you. You’re not alone.”

Yugi’s body finally relaxed as the tears he’d been fighting for so long broke through. Deep sobs could be heard in the room, bringing tears to the other two hikaris as they tried to comfort him. They could understand what he was going through and hated every second of this misery.

The crying didn’t stop even when Yugi came down with a case of the hiccups. A gentle voice called his name while handing him a glass of water. Amethyst eyes looked up to find gentle blue eyes staring down at him.

“Drink this, Yugi, it’ll stop the hiccups.”

Wordlessly, Yugi obeyed Téa’s command, drinking the water. The cool liquid helped to replenish the water that he’d lost during his crying spell. Slender hands wiped his cheeks as new tears continued to slide down the pale flesh.

“I’m sorry.”

Ryou’s arms tightened around his friend as another voice broke in. This one was firm and blessedly familiar to all of them.

”What do you have to be sorry about, Yugi? For acting like a human? You have the right to feel emotions and let them out like everybody else. In fact, it’s a good thing you’re crying right now. Holding everything in is not good, and that goes for all three of you.”

Marik and Ryou looked up at Tristan, finding that the hazel-eyed teenager was standing close beside them. Duke moved closer to the group, breaking his silence as he addressed the concerns that had been worrying all of them.

“We’re worried that you’ll drift away from the group because you’ll try to handle this by yourself. You have the three of you and that’s important because each of you understands what each other are going through. However, you must not forget that all of us are here to help you. We’re your friends, and we’re not going to let you suffer through this alone.”

Ryou, despite his knowledge of the love the friends had for each other, had to ask the one question that was burning in his brain.

“Why?”

The voice of Seto Kaiba filled the room as the CEO answered the white haired duelist’s question.

“All of us here have gone through a loss of some kind. Granted, it’s not the loss of a soul partner but we do understand what it is like to feel this kind of grief. We all want to help, and we can’t if any of you decide to push us away.”

“Yeah. You three are a part of us, like a family, and I don’t think any of us could handle losing you guys.”

Joey’s comment brought more tears to the three hikaris and when the sobs were heard, there was a gentle flurry of movement as they hurried to comfort their friends. Tristan, Duke, Téa, and Joey knelt around their friends and placed hugs when they could. Kaiba surprised everyone as he sat on the bed and laid a gentle hand on Ryou’s shoulder, providing comfort in the only way he could.

When Yugi’s grandfather walked by the room an hour later, he found the group still intertwined with each other. The hikaris were still crying, and Solomon could hear the gentle reassurances being spoken by the close-knit group. It was a relief to the older man that emotions were finally being released, and he knew that Yugi, Ryou, and Marik were in good hands.

After some time, Joey and Tristan managed to convince the others to come with them for a walk, knowing that fresh air would do them all some good. Yugi, Marik, and Ryou were quiet during the hour they were outside, trapped in thoughts that seemed to mire them down.

Marik stopped on a bridge that overlooked a small river that ran through the heart of town. Ryou and Yugi stopped as well, not saying anything as the others continued. A questioning look from the white haired teenager made the blond Egyptian break his silence.

“There was a time when I wanted him gone and now that he is, all I can focus on is the fact that I want him back. I don’t know why that is.”

Ryou, having had a yami that was nearly as twisted as Malik was, could understand. He’d wanted Bakura gone as well but near the end, something about the Spirit of the Ring had changed. He’d gentled in a way that Ryou hadn’t thought possible, and the teenager knew that he would give anything to have him back.

“I’d even let him scream at me again if it meant having him around. At first, Bakura wasn’t nice but there was something there before he left. I don’t understand it at all.”

Yugi sighed, adding his own thoughts to the mix. He couldn’t understand some of what they were talking about because Yami had been different from the others. However, he could understand the need to have his soul partner back and the void Yami’s absence had created in his heart.

“No matter who they are, they’re still our soul partners. They completed us as an individual. That wholeness is now missing, and we know it. That knowledge is what’s hurting us so badly.”

“Yeah, you’re right, Yugi.”

“As for the changes to your yamis, I’m not sure. Yami must’ve seen something though to fight for them to come with him.”

Marik gave a gentle snort, knowing how odd everyone had found that little scene. No one has expected the pharaoh to demand that the other two yamis be allowed to enter the afterlife.

“I’m surprised he did it, especially considering how he, Malik, and Bakura got along. The gods must’ve been shocked on that and regretting it now. I wonder if they’ve tried to kill each other yet?”

That question surprised a soft laugh from the other two hikaris, and Ryou added his own comment.

“I’ll bet Bakura has tried to steal something by now. He gets bored so easily.”

Marik rested his arms on the railing and laid his head on them. His lavender eyes focused on the blue-gray water that traveled beneath them.

“For all their quirks and bad habits, I do miss them.”

The other two agreed and then looked up as they heard Duke calling for them to rejoin them. The three hikaris hurried to catch up with their concerned friends, wondering if things would ever be the same again.


Author’s Note: Okay, I survived yet another chapter. Please be kind and leave your thoughts by clicking on the little review button. I’d love to know what your thinking. Stay tuned for the next chapter!!! (drags Yugi and Yami off to her playroom)