Tearing Down Souls

More Yugi suffering ahead. Lemme know what you think. I thrive on it. You'll start to really notice the decline of Yugi in this chapter. Things will become choppier because of his mindset.


I do not own Pretty Girl as sung by Sugarcult


Lyrics in **


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Pretty girl is suffering,
while he confesses everything
Pretty soon she'll figure out
what his intentions were about*

"Ryou. Ryou bunny. Wake up." Bakura doesn't like me to bother Ryou when he's sleeping but he's not here right now and I'm bored. So it's okay this time. Brown eyes. Like chocolate.

I wonder what chocolate coated Ryou bunny tastes like. "Lemme taste you."


"Yugi? What time is it?"


"Time to wake up. Come on. You want to play."


"No." He tosses himself back down with a groan. "I want to sleep. It's too fucking early for this shit. Lay down and go to sleep."


I wiggle in protest as he throws an arm around me and drags me back against his chest. It doesn't work so I lay still until his breathing evens out again. When his grip loosens I slid down the bed. I'm going to make him jump. Then he'll be happier.


"Holy fuck!"


I giggle around my mouthful. See I knew he wanted to play. I can feel his hands hovering over my shoulders and arch my back urging him to touch me. Not that it will work.


He's stubborn like that.


He twists and tries to moves away from me but I follow him until he's sitting up against the headboard. "Stop."

I sit up. He's panting and flushed. I can help him. He knows I can but he won't let me.

So I lay back. If he won't make the hurt go away I'll just do it myself. I trail my fingers up my length slowly. It's hard not to buck my hips up but Bakura told me I'm not allowed to so I lay as still as I can.


"Yugi. You don't have to..." He's trying so hard not to look at me. I reach up to tangle my hands in all that snowy white hair and pull him down against me. He gasps as I rub myself against him. "You shouldn't do this Yugi. I'm not Bakura. You don't h-have to."


"You look like Bakura. Or he looks like you." I wrap my legs around his hips so I can grind against him better. He pushes back against me. He's close. "Why don't you want me Ryou? Do I not look enough like Yami?"


He tenses suddenly and throws himself back away from me. "W-What?"


I roll over, kicking my legs in the air. "I'm bored."


"Yugi." He cups my cheek in his hand and pulls me around to look at him. "What did you say?"


"Tell me a story."


He growls and I grin because now he sounds like Bakura does when I make him happy. "Once when we were friends..."


"We are friends." He's sitting back against the headboard again and I move so I'm sitting between his legs. He's still tense but that's okay. I reach under the pillow and find the small tube Bakura always keeps there. He doesn't stop me when I take his hand in mine and smear the gel onto his fingers. I guide his hand to my opening. "Keep talking. You can do two things at once can't you."


"We were friends...gods Yugi you're still so tight." He's managed to work two fingers into me at the same time and he's trying to find that place that will make the pain worth it. "We had other friends. We would go outside with them. In the sunlight. You remember the sun don't you Yugi? Don't try making me go faster. You know you're not supposed to do that."


I slump down. Fingers are nice but they aren't enough. I hate it when he won't let me ride his fingers like I want to. "I'll let you take me."


"The sun Yugi." He sounds strained. "You used to go outside. You didn't used to be afraid. I didn't mean to hurt you."


"You're not hurting me Ryou. Just fuck me already." I groan as he finally understands and pushes into me. He's slow though. Not like Bakura. He inches his way inside of me. Bakura just shoves himself in. I'm not sure which is better. "Ryou bunny feels so good."


"Hush Yugi. Just let me love you. Let me make it up to you."

*And that's what you get for falling again
You can never get him out of your head
And that's what you get for falling again
You can never get him out of your head
It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love*

"He's getting worse."


I'm laying in the chair with my feet over the back and my head on the footrest. Bakura's leaning against the door that goes into the kitchen. And Ryou's over by the window. All the way across the room. Judging by the look on Bakura's face that's a good place for him to be. Sometimes they don't get along well. Ryou says it's because his yami doesn't know what no means. Bakura says Ryou's not supposed to say that word around him. I'm not sure if he means no or yami. Both seem to piss him off.


"There's nothing wrong with him. Nothing that you didn't cause at least." He smirks when Ryou glares at him. "He's mine Hikari."


"Don't call me that."


"And I won't let you or anyone else take him away from me."


"Wait! Who's going to take me?" I move quickly and fall to my knees next to my tall lover. He reaches down to pet me as I wrap my arms around his leg. "I don't want to go anywhere! I want to stay with you two."


"No one's going to take you." Ryou's beside me brushing my hair out of my face.


I think my hair used to be a different color. I don't remember it always being the cinnamon color it is now. I think it was brown before that. Or was it blonde? Doesn't matter. "Hey, my hair's not right."


Bakura hauls me to my feet. "It doesn't matter."


"What do you mean?" Ryou's looking up at me now. He doesn't do that often. Unless I'm on top of him. I like being on top of him. Since he won't hold me it means that I get set the pace.


"I said it doesn't matter."


"My hair was blonde. At the last place we were. I know because we had those stupid black sheets so the blood wouldn't show up but my hair still turned red."


Ryou stands. "You see. He can't even keep his thoughts straight anymore. He just goes from one topic to another with no bridge between them. Something's wrong."


Bakura is dragging me down the hall to the bedroom. "Ryou is just jealous of you Yugi. It's because you always get what he wants. He wants to make you think there's something wrong with you so he feels better."


Ryou's following us until Bakura tosses me into the bedroom. He shoves Ryou bunny back out into the hall and kicks the door shut before he slides the locks into place. I can here pounding on the door and Ryou's yelling something but Bakura's pulling me against him so I ignore it.


"He's going to be so upset he missed out." I run my hands across broad shoulders with a happy sigh.


"Look at me little light." Bakura's mahogany eyes bore into mine. "Is he right? Is it hard to think?"


I tilt my head so my bangs fall over one eye. It was easier when my hair was longer but Bakura says he likes it short. "I'm cute."


"Answer me." He's using that voice. The one that means I've done something he doesn't like.


"I'm sorry Bakura. I didn't meant to make you mad. Sometimes if I try too hard everything goes fuzzy."


He puts his thumbs under my eyes and presses down hard on my cheek bones. It hurts but in a good way. It means I did something right. "He's always been jealous of you. He's just not like you are. He likes his pain. He needs it to feel whole. Guilt is a powerful tool Yugi. If you ever want something from him and he won't give it to you just remind him that he's the reason why Yami hurt you."


I lower my head and blink quickly to keep from crying. "I don't want to talk about him. It hurts. Why does it hurt my chest so bad?"


"Hush little light. It will get better. We'll leave again. So your memories can't catch up with you."



*She's beautiful as usual
with bruises on her ego and
Her killer instinct tells her
to be aware of evil men*

I whimper as Bakura claims my lips in a bruising kiss. He nips at me so I open my mouth to grant him the entrance that he wants. He only has a few rules you have to obey. One is that you always submit to him. I'm okay with that. "You're warm down here."


I want to move against the hand that's cupping me but it's not allowed. He makes my mind go fuzzy. Even fuzzier than usual. "Do you love me?"


"I need you. You're the key to everything. You have no idea how important you are to me."


He loves me. He'll never hurt me like Yami did. He needs me. I tug at the bindings that secure me to the bed. He's testing me. To see what I remember.


"Why don't you go outside?"


He twists his wrist and I have to smother a cry. "Yami will find me if I go outside. He'll hurt me again."


I'm rewarded with a few quick jerks that have me tossing my head side to side. "Next question little light. What happens if I find out you and Ryou are doing things you aren't supposed to. What happens if you call Japan?"


"You'll leave me. You and Ryou. I need you. Need you both."


"Do you want us both?" He swipes his thumb across the head of my shaft. Ryou gave up pounding on the door. If I look over though I can see his shadow under the door. "Ryou has a phone. Ryou can leave the house. He insists on this foolish schooling and I'm not an evil man. If it makes him happy then I'll allow it. I trust Ryou. He knows what happens if he does something he's not supposed to. Come for me."


I plant my feet against the mattress and thrust into his hand. The only bad part is when I come I loose track of what's going on around me.


"Yugi, wake up. You're okay." Warm hands draw me back to myself. I can pull my hands down from above my head now. I roll over to my side, cuddling against a warm back. Bakura grumbles in his sleep. He doesn't like to be touched. Ryou stretches out on my other side so I roll towards him instead. I tangle my leg between his and throw an arm over him. He doesn't like to be touched either but at least I know he won't beat me bloody if I lay on him. "You reek of sex."


"You're just jealous."


"Maybe." He sighs. "Yes. No."


"Doesn't matter."


"No. I guess it doesn't."

I let sleep claim me, carrying me down into the darkness.

*And that's what you get for falling again
You can never get him out of your head
And that's what you get for falling again
You can never get him out of your head*
It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love*

"I'm bleeding."


Ryou looks up from his stack of books wide eyed. He glances down at my arm then back up at me. He stands up and reaches out to pull me into the kitchen. He sits me up on the counter before digging under the sink for the first aid kit. "What did you do?"


"Bakura did it."


He presses a cotton pad against my arm and wraps it with gauze to hold it in place. He wipes the blood off of my forearm with a wet towel. He's mad. I can see it in his eyes. It's time for his test.


Bakura is sitting on the stairs. Out of sight. He told Ryou he was going out to do whatever it is he does to get us food and money. He lied.

He needed my help he said. Needed to test Ryou the way he tested me. So I let him cut the thin line on my arm. It stung a little, bled a lot. Just like it was supposed to. Now we find out if Ryou is as smart as he's supposed to be.


"Why did he cut you? What did you do?" He tosses the towel in the trash not even bothering to try to clean it.

It's not our house anyway. We live here now but only because Bakura found it for us. We had to clean it up some when we first moved in. There was broken glass everywhere and a couple holes in the walls. We just moved the couch in front of the stains on the wall.


I let my eyes fill up with tears. "I told him I wanted to call Yami."


He yanks me off of the counter using my injured arm as a lever and slams me up against the stove. "You can't. You aren't allowed. You don't need him. You have us."


He raises his hand to hit me and I grin when Bakura catches him before he can. "You'll leave marks. How will we explain that?"


Ryou turns, not seeming to care that he's twisting his own wrist. He leans up and kisses Bakura. I'm a little surprised. Usually he doesn't like to encourage him. "I'm not in the mood for this shit. I haven't called them. I haven't talked to any of them since we switched to the new phones."


"You talked to Malik." Bakura releases him to lean against the counter. "It's been a while but I know you did."


"You left your phone here. He called. I answered it. He doesn't know where we are. Hell I'm not sure he cares. I was on the phone with him long enough to tell him to leave us alone. Hell I even told him if he told the others he talked to us Yugi would never have the chance to go back. Check the records. I left it in there. I never tried to hide the call."


"You didn't tell me about it." He motions to me. "He had to tell me."


"I didn't think it was that big of a deal. I'm sorry." Ryou goes back over to his books. He's taking collage courses. Under a different name. That way...what's his name...blue eyes...over obsession with flared trench coats...Seto, yeah so Seto can't find us.


I'm never alone though. Bakura's with me during the day and Ryou's here at night. Bakura and I sleep during the day and then when Ryou goes to bed I take a nap with him. I sleep a lot now. I don't know why. Ryou wanted to take me to the doctor. He had bruises on his ribs for the next three weeks. The longest I've had bruises is two weeks. Hehe I heal faster.


"I won't do it again Bakura. Besides Malik doesn't like Yami anyway. Too much bad blood between the two of them." Ryou shuts the books and picks them up to take them upstairs. "But if you want me to prove I'm telling you the truth then come with me. It's been a long time since it was just the two of us. I'll open the link. But Yugi stays away."


Bakura grins at me before he follows Ryou out of the kitchen. He flips off the light on his way out. "Stay here."


I huddle down in the corner trying not to cry. I can hear Ryou's pleasured cries echoing through the house. It was mean of them to leave me alone. I don't like being alone. I've been good.


There was no reason to leave me alone. It was all Ryou's fault. He was the one who suggested it. I hate him sometimes. Sometimes I think he tries to hurt me on purpose. It won't work though because no one will ever hurt me like Yami did. I can never hate anyone as much as I hate him.

*Pretty girl, pretty girl*

Ryou wants me. He says he needs me but he lies. I don't think he knows if he's lying to me or himself though. He's stronger than he thinks he is. Sometimes though he starts to think. It makes him sad.


Like right now.


He's sitting on the couch watching me with this sad look in those dark brown eyes.


"Ryou bunny. What's wrong?"


He smiles but it looks forced. "You just look a lot like someone I used to love. I'll tell you a story if you put the notepad away."


I glance down at the random shapes I've been drawing. Not doing anything important so I guess it won't hurt. I shut the book before taking it upstairs and tucking it away in the blue backpack that's sitting in the back of the closet. Bakura knows about the notepad but not the backpack. Ryou says it's not important so he doesn't care. One little backpack can't change my life too much so I ignore it as well.


I wander back down the stairs and plop down on the couch next to my pretty lover, pushing blue-black hair behind my ears. It's finally long enough to stay there now. Bakura says he'll make Ryou cut it again soon.


"Once, when you were still...when you were different, I did something that I never should have done. I convinced myself that it wasn't fair that you got whatever you wanted and I got what was left over. I thought I was light trying to survive in the shadow of someone who didn't have a care in the world. I was wrong. I wanted someone who was already spoken for. The only person in a long time to show me that I was special too. But he only wanted me as part of a matched set. So I left. But I hurt someone. Not just the person I loved but the one they loved as well."


"I don't believe that. You would never hurt someone just to get your way. You're not like Bakura is." Ryou wouldn't hurt anyone. Besides this story is a lie. Bakura and I are the only ones who have ever loved him the way he needs to be loved.


He buries his face in my hair and starts to sob. "I wish that was true. Everyday I feel like I'm falling deeper into the dark. Sometimes I can't tell where Bakura ends and I begin."


"That's good though. It's what you want. To be one with your other. Mind, body and soul."


He's trembling so hard that I'm afraid he's actually hurt. "Ryou, you should call Bakura. He'll make it better."


"It's all my fault Yugi. I'll fix it. I swear I will. I just need a little more time."


I rub his arms and make little soothing noises. I don't know what's wrong with him. "Love me."


"I'm trying Yugi. I'm trying as hard as I can. Gods help me sometimes I think I do."


"Good." If he loves me then everything is okay. Everything is the way it's supposed to be.

*Pretty girl is suffering, while he confesses everything
Pretty soon she'll figure out
You can never get him out of your head*
It's the way
That he makes you cry
It's the way
That he in your mind
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love
It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way that he makes you fall in love
Love*

"Malik?"

"..."

"Hey, it's Ryou."

"..."

"I'm sorry it took me so long to call."

"..."

"No everything's okay. Well as okay as it can be."

"..."

"No, he's fine. Tell Yami that we're both fine."

"..."

"Bakura's been hanging around a lot lately. That kind of makes it hard to call."

"..."

'No. It won't do you any good to come here. We're moving again soon."

"..."

"I don't know yet. If I could get him to tell in advance I would but-"

"..."

"No. Just tell him to keep checking the collage databases for Daisuke. We need to get Yugi home soon. He's not doing so good."

"..."

"I'm more worried about him right now."

"..."

"Look I have to go. I'll call again as soon as I can."

"..."

"You too. Just don't give up on us."

Ryou snapped his phone closed. He had to hurry or he'd be late for class. Everything was starting to come together.

"I'll get you home soon Yugi. Back to Yami where you belong. Where we both belong."