Fixation

A/N: Yes, Seto’s behavior is OC in this chapter, but it is consistent with how many people with Asperger’s react to being completely removed from their daily routine.

Chapter 26


Seto lost seventeen pounds by the time they made it to a populated town. He had also gone through three of the breakdowns that Nakamura-sensai had warned Jou about. Jou could hardly believe that he was really dealing with Kaiba Seto, by the end. The Kaiba Seto he knew did not pout, and he never, ever threw himself flat on the ground and smacked his head against a rock until he exhausted himself.

When Jou found himself completely helpless, unable to communicate with Seto at all, and unable to physically restrain him through an entire tantrum, he gave up on his fantasy of spending two months exploring isolated volcanic hot springs and sea cliffs with Seto. When Seto refused to eat more than a few bites of oatmeal when he was calm and normal, Jou knew he had to get him back to civilization fast.

The nearest town was about a hundred miles away. If Jou were traveling alone, he knew he could make the hike in about six to seven days. Jou had no idea what kind of shape Seto was in, so he guessed that it would take about ten to twelve days. They set out a little over forty-eight hours after Seto was thrown out of the Kaiba Corporation helicopter, after arguing about just how much food they should take. Seto insisted that he could make do with oatmeal and informed Jou that the freeze-dried meals were all disgusting. Jou tried to tell him that he’d be burning a lot more calories than he was used to, but Seto wouldn’t listen.

Jou, having done back country Search and Rescue as a relaxing hobby, loaded his pack with as many extra provisions as he could carry and began calculating just what route he would have to take to carry Seto to a town when the other man finally collapsed. It hadn’t quite come to that, but only because Seto had started out a little bit over weight to begin with.

Seto, being Seto, refused to eat more than the oatmeal he had packed until he woke on the sixth morning of their hike too weak to move. Jou finally managed to get him to eat a freeze-dried package of spaghetti around sunset, but by then they’d lost an entire day of hiking.

The next day, they had only managed about four hours at a slow pace before Seto fell to his knees and started screaming. After nearly an hour of trying to get him to stop. Jou had yelled at him, pleaded with him, shaken him, and finally punched him, all trying to get him to stop. When he punched Seto, Seto drabbed his wrist and pulled his arm forward, holding Jou’s wrist and watch just a few inches from his eyes. His ice blue eyes took in the time on the digital display, and then Seto grew silent and relaxed. After ten minutes of awkward silence, he muttered something about his watch getting wet and stopping. Jou bit his cheek to keep himself from saying anything as he unstrapped his own watch and handed it over.

On day fourteen, they ran out of food at breakfast and it took Jou two hours to pull Seto out of the catatonic state that news had sent him into. They would have made it into town by noon with plenty of time for lunch if Seto hadn’t turned off like some kind of robot. However, by the time Jou got Seto moving again, it was already well passed lunch time. When they began their trek, Jou thought that they would be able to walk into town, get a nice room at a bed and breakfast, get cleaned up, and then go out for a nice dinner. Instead, Jou rented a car, bought a dozen of the foil-packed protein shakes Seto lived off of, and drove them South towards Reykjavik.

Near the airport in Reykjavik, Jou found a five star hotel that catered to European tourists and practically carried Seto into the hotel’s presidential suite. Jou gave the hotel concierge his own credit card and asked that he make arrangements for suits, a watch battery, and a new laptop to be purchased and delivered to their room as soon as possible. Once Seto had showered, shaved, and dressed in a suit, he very methodically replaced the battery in his watch and set the time. When Seto announced that he had chartered a plane to take them home, Jou finally let himself relax. The announcement was the first thing Seto had said to him in nearly five days.

Jou intended to take a shower and shave off two week old beard that had grown since they left his base-camp. He had at least meant to change into respectable, clean clothes. All he managed before he finally fell asleep was to take his boots and socks off. When Jou woke up, the room was dark. Seto was sitting at the desk in the suite living area typing away on his laptop. The rhythm reminded Jou of the day he had first realized that Seto liked him. He had been sitting in study hall listening to Seto type and had discovered that the only thing Seto would pay attention to other than his work was Jou himself. Jou stretched on the bed and groaned, louder than was strictly necessary. He allowed himself a real smile when he heard the rhythm of Seto’s typing falter.

Jou climbed out of bed and padded into the bathroom. He shaved and turned the shower on as hot as it would go. In less than a minute, the bathroom was filling with steam. He stepped into the shower and let the water wash over him, soothing the tension and knots in his muscles. He covered himself in the complimentary soap, and then rinsed and covered himself in soap again. He had just rinsed the last of the soap and reached for the complimentary shampoo when he heard the bathroom door open. Jou saw Seto’s figure silhouetted against the shower curtain and waited for a moment, wondering if the other man wanted to talk or wanted to join him in the shower. He was a bit disappointed when Seto just leaned against the vanity counter instead of hoping in the shower.

“What’s up?” Jou asked, peeking around the shower curtain.

“I think I owe you an apology,” Seto began slowly.

Jou stared at the embarrassed look on Seto’s face. “If you’re apologizing for the way you raised your brother, then apology accepted.”

“I meant for how I’ve acted. I know it’s no excuse, but I don’t deal that well with changes. I really don’t deal that well with things I’m not used to…”

“You don’t say,” Jou replied, covering his growing hair in the shampoo.

When Seto didn’t take the bait, Jou peered out of the shower again to make sure the bastard was still there. He was still leaning against the counter, but he wasn’t even glaring. Jou wasn’t sure he’d ever seen Seto embarrassed enough to ignore his taunts.

“I know it’s changed things,” Seto said quietly. “And I know we didn’t exactly figure things out because of my… because of me… I need to get back to Domino and deal with Mokuba, so I figured I’d… I’d leave it up to you. I bought you a ticket back to the States, first class, of course. My plane leaves at nine tomorrow if you…” Seto raised his eyes to meet Jou’s gaze for a moment, then turned towards the door. “Never mind.”

“Are you always going to be such a fucking drama queen? You’ve got issues, I get it. Now get your ass in here!”

“But I… This whole time…”

Jou conditioned his hair quickly and pulled the shower curtain half-open. “Seto, when I was in the hospital that night, and you bet me that you could survive in the wilderness without a lot of creature comforts… You were totally full of shit, weren’t you?”

“Yes. I found a picture of you backpacking and a few articles about work you’ve done with juvenile delinquents. I figured that it would be easier to seduce you if you thought we had something in common.”

Jou leaned against the tile, not bothering to try to hide the smile on his face.

“You weren’t into Duel Monsters anymore,” Seto explained. “And you were going to leave. I tried everything I could think of.”

“You’re not the only one with issues, Seto. I’ve gotten to see some of yours, and I can safely say mine are just about as bad.”

“Don’t humor me, Jounouchi. I know how fucked up I am, thank you.”

“Humor you? Seto, I twitch at sudden movements. I commute for four hours every day because every time I see a familiar face that I can’t put a name to, I nearly have a panic attack. I started backpacking with Esme and her husband because it takes being in the middle of nowhere for me to unwind enough to get a full night’s sleep. Well, that or a fuck of a lot of alcohol. I wake up with flashbacks, you know. A twelve year old bleeding out on the concrete in front of me and not knowing whether to keep putting pressure on the gunshot wound, start CPR, or shoot the fucking Sergeant bragging about shooting him. A suicidal kid whose folks couldn’t afford to hospitalize their son. They took everything that he could hurt himself with away, so he bit two inch deep chunks out of his wrists trying to kill himself. A Mexican kid who was born into l’Eme and was flayed alive just for talking to me… ”

“Jou…”

“That wasn’t a figure of speech!” Jou shouted. “He had a Mexican mafia tattoo covering most of his back. He was seen talking to me, about his kid brother’s fucking soccer game, of all things, and his gang kicked him out. But the tattoo belongs to the gang, so they cut it off and took it back!”

“You manage to function, though,” Seto cut in, “Paranoid or not.”

“That’s the fucked up part!” Jou sang. “I’m not paranoid! A shrink explained it once. Apparently, paranoia is a delusion that everyone’s out to get you. A delusion is an incorrect belief about the nature of reality. It’s not a mental illness if everyone really is out to get you. And I can get on with work, but there’s nothing normal about not being able to fuck somebody unless they beat the crap out of your first!”

The corner of Seto’s lips twitched and his eyebrows drew together. “You’re not totally submissive, Jou. You managed to top me, after all.”

Jou blushed furiously and turned back into the shower. “Yeah, well, if it weren’t you, it wouldn’t have happened. And I wasn’t exactly on top that time, was I? I fucked you, but you told were still in control.”

“So, the only reason you got turned on,” Seto’s expression softened into his trademarked smirk, “Is because I told you to?”

Jou leaned his forehead against the tile and took a deep breath. “I know how pathetic it is.”

“Pathetic…” Seto echoed. “Hell of a turn on, though.”

Jou chuckled. “The bottom line, Seto, is that we both have some weird needs. You need routine, I get that. You could conquer the world so long as your alarm clock goes off at the same time every day, you never have to taste anything new, and your Blackberry is fully charged. Your company will never, ever switch to iPhones, no matter how cool they are, because even your PDA operating system is part of your routine. I need to escape from the world occasionally. I need to feel like I’m doing something worthwhile with my life. And I need you. I need somebody to be in charge, at least in bed.”

“I like to think I was fairly thorough when it came to deducing what you need in bed,” Seto said smugly.

“But I also need somebody who isn’t going to act like it makes me…” Jou couldn’t even say it.

“You’re not a coward, Jou,” Seto whispered, from just beyond the shower curtain. “You are not weak. And, no matter what you think, it doesn’t make you pathetic. Plus, you’re stuck with me, so it’s probably a good thing that I need somebody who likes being dominated in bed but doesn’t act like some whiny little twit otherwise,” Seto declared. “I don’t bottom well.”

“You don’t? And I’m stuck with you?”

“Yeah. You promised I could take a turn with that vibrator. I tried fixing it while you were asleep, but it’s totally destroyed. I could replace it, I suppose, but that wouldn’t be exactly the same. It wouldn’t be keeping your promise. So, you’re stuck with me. I don’t bottom well, but that night I was willing to take what I could get—I told you as much. I didn’t actually count on you being willing to stay.”

Jou felt long slender fingers tangle in his the hair at the back of his head and pull him away from the tile and half out of the shower. Jou felt his brain melt. Seto forced Jou’s chin up and pulled him to the edge of the bathtub. Seto leaned close, almost kissing him.

“But if Mokuba knows he can force this, or if he thinks he’s won, then he’ll use the same tactic to try to make sure you stay in Japan…”

Jou’s brain tried to point out that Seto was saying something important, but the pain at the base of his skull and the feel of Seto’s breath against his lips effectively switched his mind off.

“I can’t turn him in,” Seto continued. “He’s my brother. He’s everything to me. Everything except you.” Seto’s grip tightened in his hair. “Moan.”

Jou couldn’t help but obey. “Routine…” Jou gasped. “Take away… His fixations… Take away the routine… I’ve…Damn it, I need you, Seto!”

“What do you need?” Seto chuckled.

“You, you bastard!”

“I think you might need to be a bit more specific.”

“Stop worrying about Mokuba and fuck me already!” Jou growled.

Jou felt the hand clenched in his hair tighten. Seto dragged him out of the bathroom, dripping and naked, and threw him onto the bed. Jou’s entire body quaked in anticipation. No matter how much baggage the bastard came with, no one else in the world could make Jou feel like Seto could.


* * * * * *


Jou stood with his arms folded behind his back, watching from behind mirrored sunglasses as three members of his childhood gang forced Mokuba out of a black, unmarked helicopter. The younger man’s dress shirt was torn, his hair was wild, but he was unharmed—more or less. Jou pulled a radio from his belt. “Please send Asano-san my deepest regards, and my gratitude,” he spoke into the radio.

“Asano-sama is honored to offer his assistance in this matter,” one of the younger gangsters replied, “And hopes that his help might go towards mending your faith in him, Jounouchi-san.”

Jou nodded towards the helicopter. The man with the radio slid the door shut and the pilot wasted no time in taking off.

Jou shifted his weight to the balls of his feet and brought both of his hands forward, holding them half-way between a defensive stance and a normal conversational posture. Mokuba’s glare was fiercer than anything Seto had ever thrown at him. Seto stepped to Jou’s side, glaring right back at his brother.

“After everything I’ve done for you…” Seto shook his head slowly. “You left me in the middle of nowhere with nothing except Jounouchi and a hundred miles of rocks! No phone, no computer, no protein shakes, and not one single fucking coffee bean!”

“You obviously survived,” Mokuba sneered.

“Well, I’m done,” Seto said simply. “Whether or not you survive is now entirely up to Jounouchi. Whether or not you ever see your PSP, Game Boy, or even a chess set again is up to Jounouchi. Whether or not you get to come home if you get out of this alive is up to Jounouchi. You wanted him in our lives so bad, well, you got it. I have concluded legal proceedings to have you declared mentally incompetent and signed you, and all of your assets, over to Jou’s custody and control. I am done. Jou, I’ll be waiting at the helicopter.”

Jou nodded.

Mokuba’s sneer had softened a bit. The younger boy folded his arms and leered at Jou. “You two are staying together, then?”

Jou shrugged. “Who knows? We’re together at the moment, though.”

“And I suppose this is supposed to be some kind of punishment for what I’ve done?”

Jou shrugged again.

“This isn’t going to work. I’m an adult, Jou, and I’m better at coping with change than Seto is.”

Jou just shrugged again. “Seto’s not your responsibility anymore.“There’s some gear over by that tree,” Jou pointed to the edge of the meadow, “and some books that might help you get out of here. There’s also food that Seto assures me you’ll actually eat, and oatmeal. He just wanted to give you oatmeal, so consider yourself lucky. There are food caches tucked away around the woods, with GPS transmitters, and one of those books contains instructions on how to use the GPS to find them. I wouldn’t try taking it apart or fucking with it, since you’ve only got a week’s worth of food at any one time. I didn’t give you anything to start a fire with, since you probably wouldn’t find anything wrong with burning down ten thousand acres of forest just to get someone’s attention, so you’re fucked there. If you follow the GPS transmitters, you should get out of here within eight months. After that, I will outline a very specific routine that you will follow, with very specific rules. Follow the rules, and you’ll get your games back. Keep following them and I might let you have supervised dates with Yugi.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Mokuba folded his arms. He actually looked amused.

“And if I ever decide that I can trust you with my back turned,” Jou said slowly, “You might see your brother again.”

If Jou hadn’t been looking for it, he wouldn’t have noticed the way Mokuba’s smile twitched. The look in his eyes was the same one Jou had seen when Seto discovered that the food Mario had packed did not include a single protein shake.

“You can’t keep me away from my brother,” Mokuba laughed, but it looked like it took him a lot He’ll break down within a week! And then your only choice is going to be to let his doctor commit him or to come back here and beg me to help you!”

Jou shrugged again. “Don’t know about that. See, he’s got a negative association with hiking stuck in his head at the moment, so we’re heading to someplace pretty and Wi-Fi enabled, to try and fix that. Just for a week, mind you. You, though, are pretty much on your own. If you get out of here, I suggest you find a payphone and give me a call. The number is printed in waterproof ink on your pack. Otherwise, you’re going to find out just how far you can get in a small mountain town with no money, no friends, no identification, and no passport. You will not get all the way to Japan, I can tell you that much. If you do get back to Japan, you’ll find that Kaiba Corporation security has been completely replaced with my own people, in the building and the house. Your access codes have been revoked, your transmitter frequency disabled, your cell phone turned off, your bank accounts frozen, the whole nine yards. You will be arrested if you try to get into the house or the building without me. Asano-san will have you killed if you try to go to the Yakuza. The only way you survive is my way.”

“I can always stay with Yugi until Seto comes to his senses,” Mokuba laughed. “Poor little Yugi… You know I’m the only thing keeping him from killing himself, don’t you? Do you know how depressed he became, when all of his friends abandoned him? The things he lets me do to him, just so he can feel like he’s still alive?”

Jou forced himself not to smile. He knew for a fact that Yugi, at that very moment, was sitting on the porch of a small stucco house in LA, picking up as much Spanish slang as Mario and his brothers could teach him and apparently learning how to skateboard. He was having far too much fun translating some of his more colorful jokes into Spanish. Since Anzu was in LA trying to expand her career into acting, Yugi was even catching up with more old friends.

“He’ll kill himself before four months have passed, you know.”

“He’s not your responsibility any more, either. The only thing you’ve got to do is get out of here, and I am pretty sure getting out of here is going to be sheer hell for you. Then, if you want to have anything that resembles your old life back, you will obey my rules. You will obey or I’ll drop your ass back here with nothing at all and let you starve. You will get it through your head that the people around you are more than toys for you to fuck with, or you will never see another person again.”

“I get it, I get it… You really expect me to believe that you’re going to spend the rest of your life keeping me imprisoned?”

“Look around you, Mokie. You’ve got about sixteen thousand square miles of incredible national park to get lost in, and in this part of it the only living creatures you’ve got to worry about are bear. Read the chapter on grizzly bears first, by the way. That’s about as free as it gets. You’ve got no idea how lucky you are that I didn’t decide to drop your ass in the Sahara or the Australian Outback. I am not going to keep you locked up, I’m just going to keep you behaved. But, that’s enough of that. I don’t really want to hang out with you, either.” Jou backed away from Mokuba, confident in his steps because he had carefully checked his footing before Mokuba arrived. Seto took his arm from behind and walked him back to the waiting helicopter. It took a moment for them to take off, and during that time, Mokuba stood stalk still, glaring at them both.

Seto leaned against the window, staring down at his brother with a deep frown. “Are you sure he’s going to be okay out here?”

“No,” Jou said honestly. “But there’s no one for him to kill, no one for him to fuck with, and nothing for him to do but thing. That little microchip of yours will tell you if he stops moving, or if his vitals drop. All you’ve got to do is stay out of the picture and just watch from a distance. It’s this or prison, Seto.”

Seto swallowed hard and nodded.

“I am positive that he’ll do his best to survive, if nothing else to try to prove to me that I can’t control him.”

“And can you control him?”

“Not on my own, no. But I’ve got you, a Domino PD Detective, a Yakuza crime lord, the King of Games, a hot Mexican jujitsu instructor, and half the LAPD to call on if I need to. And Esmerelda. All the showy jujitsu stuff Mario can pull off, Esme can actually hurt people with. She has that Mom voice now, too…” Jou shivered.

Jou leaned over Seto’s lap to stare down at the vast forests and peaks of Glacier National Park. “You can’t tell me this isn’t beautiful,” Jou whispered.

“I’d say handsome. Maybe cute. I don’t know about beautiful.”

Jou looked up into Seto’s face. The other man’s blue eyes were locked solidly on him.

“Never get sick of making me blush, do you?”

“Never,” Seto agreed.

“I’m never going to get you to go backpacking with me again, am I?”

“I sent you the brochure from that resort,” Seto said simply.

“That’s not backpacking,” Jou insisted.

“It’s walking through the woods and you sleep in a tent each night.”

“They send a butler along in a hummer. They have your tent and a chef prepared meal waiting for you at each stop, with hot chocolate! That’s hardly even hiking.”

Seto pulled Jou into his lap and nuzzled his neck. “I was traumatized,” he insisted. “Baby steps are the only way to get over it. Besides, we’ve way too much to do before we can even think about taking a vacation.”

“Everything’s cleaned up on my end. Ally was out of my hands already, since I was planning on spending the rest of my life in those hot springs,” said Jou. “And cleaning up Kaiba Corp’s security ain’t that big a deal. I hired some good people, and brought over some great managers. And you can’t have that much to deal with. Sakura’s still running the company an’ all.”

“I meant sex,” said Seto bluntly. “And shopping. Without Yugi’s expertise, we’re going to have to browse, research options, experiment… It could take months. And there is nothing to hook a pair of handcuffs around in a tent.”

Jou’s breath caught and his stomach tightened. “I could stand a few quiet months to get caught up on shopping,” he agreed.