A Series of Break up Fics

So how many of you noticed that Beautiful Disaster and Breakdown were turned into a fic? If you didn't I'll give you a hint it's now under the title Tearing Down Souls. Should shape up to be 5 parts including the two that are up here. Everyone cheer for Yugi and Ryou torture! YAY! And to continue with this lovely tradition of making the boys suffer I have found someone new to break. Everyone give a sad aww for Malik. *demented giggle* Poor little pretty golden godling. Uh-oh, my husband is giving me that Ravana has lost her mind look again. On with the

story then.


I don't own Gomennasai as sung by TaTu


Pairing: Malik/Yugi, Malik/Ryou, Malik/Seto *hums Heartbreaker to self (which I don't own either, notice the trend?)*


lyrics in * *


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*What I thought wasn't mine
In the light
Was one of a kind,
A precious pearl
When I wanted to cry
I couldn't cause I
Wasn't allowed*


First there was Yugi.


Sweet innocent Yugi with his easy smile and loving words. Cheerful amethyst eyes and punk wannabe hair. Chaste kisses and shy brushes of his hand against mine.


There was so much I wanted to show him. So much I wanted to see. The thought of those plump lips falling open to let those soft cries escape had me hard just thinking about it. And the fact that he was so willing just added to it.


So I had waited for him. Draped across my motorcycle outside of his family's game shop. He had been so shocked when he came out and saw me. I smirked and peered at him over the top of my sunglasses. He bit his lower lip, glancing back at the door he had just come through. For a moment I wondered if he was going to go back inside or worse call for the Pharaoh. But he didn't. Trusting little fool that he was.


"Malik-kun. What are you doing here?"


I leaned back, putting my hands behind me on the seat to hold myself up. "My sister and Rashid have decided I need to spend more time with people my own age. That limits the number down to well you."


"Oh." That bright grin lit his features. "I could call the others if you want."


That had not been part of the plan. Easy to fix. "Actually I was hoping you would come over for a while. Just so they'll leave me alone for a while. Your friends don't like me. No don't say it. I know it's true. No big deal."


He glanced towards the shop again. "Um, okay."


"Do you need to tell Pharaoh?"


He shook his head looking annoyed. "He's too busy doing whatever it is that famous people do in their off time. So you want me to meet you at your house or...?"


I moved forward and handed him my helmet. "Hop on. You wear this because I don't want one of those things famous people do being coming after me if something happens to you. Just hold on to the seat or, hell, me if you want to, just not too high, I need my arms to steer. Don't try to lean into the corners though."


The drive to my house was fun. He had tried to hold onto the seat but it just didn't work well for him so two blocks from his place he wrapped his arms around my waist. Every bump pushed him closer and caused his hands to brush my crotch. At the first stop light he gathered my hair in a loose ponytail and flipped in under my shirt.


"Keeps hitting me in the face" he explained. I just grinned.


When we arrived back at my house I ushered him inside toeing off my boots and watching him do the same. I pointed up the stairs. "My room's up there. On the left. We can play a video game or something. I dunno. Of course the only place I have to sit is the floor or the bed. Your choice."


I shut the bedroom door behind us softly. No use scaring him. "Your room's not like I imagined it."


"What were you expecting? Black sheets and blood stained walls?"


He wrinkled his nose before plopping down on my bed. My bed with nice normal white sheets. "Nothing like that. I'm not sure what I expected really just not this. So what do you want to do? You invited me over after all."


I tipped my head to the side like I was thinking. "We could watch a movie."


I put a DVD in the player, hesitating for a moment before I hit start. I climbed up on the bed beside the other, lazily spreading my legs so he was sitting between them without it seeming like that was my intention. The first scene started and Yugi went bright red. "What's wrong?"


"I...This is...I..."


"Porn Yugi. You can say a simple four letter word can't you?" I pulled him closer, ignoring the stiffening posture. "Don't worry. Guys watch this kind of stuff together all the time. Grant it most don't watch gay porn together but hey whatever."


He licked his lips, shifting away then back towards me. "I know but I've never...when Jou and Honda...I never sit this close to them."


"Their loss. Look I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to but if you did want something," I whispered the next words against his neck delighting in the shudder I received in response. "I'm right here to lend a hand or anything else you might need."


I'll give Yugi credit. Ten minutes into the video and he still noticed when I started to trace random patterns on his thighs. He just glanced up at me with this adorable blush staining his cheeks before turning back to the screen. Fifteen minutes in and my hand wandered up to brush across the front of his jeans. He caught himself as he started to arch up. It was annoying. He wasn't supposed to be this strong willed. I should have known though. So I tried something else. I popped the button on his jeans and eased the zipper down.


"Just watch the movie. That's got to be uncomfortable with those tight jeans on. I just want to help you. We're friends right? You always help a friend." I was not above using his own mantra against him.


He shifted as I slid his jeans down his hips taking his boxers with them. He whimpered quietly as I reached over to my nightstand and pulled out a bottle of lotion and coated my hand. Soft cries were forced from him when I fisted his hardness and started a slow pumping.


"Malik-kun, I haven't ever...No one has ever...oh gods."


"Shh pet. Just feel it. Don't think about it. Or think about being him" I motioned to the TV with my free hand. "Think about what it would be like to have someone on their knees if front of you. Has anyone ever done that for you? Someone should. Look at how much he likes it. Imagine someone taking you in their mouth. Sucking you. I bet you taste so sweet. You're so good Yugi. None of them realize that there is no one else in this world like you."


His hands were fisted in the sheets. His hips rising and falling with the rhythm I set. I slid my other hand under his tee shirt, running my fingernails over his nipples. Desperate whines coming from deep in his throat. He sounded so much like his Yami now.


"You've always been so nice to me. Do you have idea how much you've done for me. I was never allowed to show emotion but you do so easily. Even now. I know what you want just from the sounds you're making."


I let my lips find his neck and set to marking him as mine. That proved to be a little too much stimulation for him and he came hard into my hand. I moved with him, groaning when he grabbed a handful of my hair and pulled it trying to ground himself back in this world. He suddenly went limp gasping for breath. I rolled my hips against his back finding my release.


Bleary eyed he shook his head when the video restarted. "I can't again Malik. Not yet. Just turn it off okay."


I fumbled for the remote and did as he asked.


*Gomennasai for everything
Gomennasai, I know I let you down
Gomennasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now*


I wanted to keep him. I wanted to be with him. But he was too pure. Even after everything we had done to each other.

Everything we had done together. The day with the movie was just the start.


He was so eager but still so innocent. He never stopped blushing you know. He would call me in the middle of the day just as often as he would in the middle of the night. For three blissful weeks we were together.


But then his friends started to notice.


"Honda-kun asked me where I keep disappearing to."


"What'd you tell him?" I knew it was going to happen eventually. It always does.


"That I'd been trying to find a part time job to help with the bills."


"You lied to them?"


"What else was I supposed to do? They'd never..."


"Accept me? Like me? Does it matter? To us? Or just to you?" He shouldn't have lied to them.


But he did. Because of me.


So I did the kindest thing I could. I let him go.


He cried and I couldn't admit to him how much it hurt to watch him shed tears because of me. Again. No matter how it started it always ended with him crying. We just weren't good together.


No.

I wasn't good for him.


He would have ended up hating me in the end. His friends would have made sure of that.


Really I was just doing what everyone knew I would do eventually. I just beat them to the thought. No use disappointing.


I just wanted a friend who would accept me. Yugi accepted everyone for who they were and all of their baggage included.


It just wasn't meant to be.


So I ignored the let down look in those violet depths and moved on.


*What I thought wasn't all
So innocent
Was a delicate doll
Of porcelain
When I wanted to call you
And ask you for help
I stopped myself*


In fact I moved right on to Bakura Ryou.


We had never been the best of friends but he at least knew me. And I knew him. Sure it was only because our yamis were trying to take over the world but hey whatever right. It worked for me.


Of course I knew that Ryou didn't always have it easy. But who does? So his father was never around. So what? At least he hadn't scarred his only son over some stupid sense of duty. I am not bitter.

Ryou was hard and soft all at the same time. Silky hair perfect to run my fingers through and that trim body hidden under layers of clothes.


I tried to be gentle with him. He just made it so damn hard.


I suppose it made sense. All he had ever known was his Yamis touch and the tomb robber had too many of his own issues to be anything other than rough. Let's hear it for bad childhoods. I swear if people knew what happened when those kids grew up they'd never...never mind.


I didn't have to seduce Ryou. I just broke into his house.


You should have seen him come flying off of his bed when I slammed the window behind me. It was priceless. He was breathless and posed to either submit or attack. I don't think he could ever figure out which he really wanted to do. His feet spread wide to balance but his head down staring at me through snowy bangs. A fallen angel.

A bare chested fallen angel in short boxers.


"Damn it Malik. I told you not to do that anymore. Use the fucking front door would you." He didn't falter in his stance however. I don't think he ever really trusted me.


"What would your dad think of you using that kind of language?" I flicked a finger against his chest as I strolled to his desk and leaned a hip on it.


"He's not around enough for it to matter is he." Not a question just a statement of fact. He could be brutally honest when he wanted to be.


"What are you doing here?"


"I'm horny."


A deep sigh was his only reply.


"What?"


"I'm tired. I have a class in the morning I can't miss. And I figured you were hard up. It's the only time you come over." He wandered over to me. "Sit down."


I just grinned at him. He never told me no. It didn't matter what I asked him to do, he would do it with well not a smile but no complaints.


"You going to suck me off?"


He lowered his eyes refusing to look at me when we did this. "Is that what you want?"


"It's up to you. What do you want to do?" I caught his chin in my hand and forced his head up. "Look at me Ry. What do you want?"


His brown gaze was locked on a spot just over my shoulder. "I don't care Malik. I told you I'm tired. Just tell me what you want from me and I'll do it."


That was what drove me insane. He wouldn't decide for himself. It was easier to just go along with what someone else wanted. "You know what I want."


"I'm not having this discussion again. I'll let you fuck me, I'll suck you off, I'll fuck you if you ever wanted that. I'll bleed for you or make you bleed for me. I'll come for you, on you, with you or inside you. I'll ride you or writhe under you. I'll whisper things that no one should ever think of to you while you jack off. But I am not talking about that anymore." He pushed me into his desk chair and straddled my lap. "I like these pants. No zippers to mess with. Besides the whole khaki cargo look is good on you."


"Geez Ry could you be anymore gay?" I gasped as he ground against me.


"Looks like it." He flipped his hair forward to surround me. His hair smells like almonds and honey. It's not a natural smell. It's the only shampoo I haven't thrown out the door or poured down the sink. The rest were just too girly. When your hair is as long as his is you should take care of it. Still half the time my fingers get caught in tangles. I think he just keeps it long because it pisses his dad off.


I held his hips to guide his movements. He shifted slightly so I was rubbing against the place I desperately want to be but clothes separated us so I allowed myself to be content with that slow glide. He said he doesn't want to lead those encounters but he's wrong.


His movement faltered for a moment. He tugged at the hem of my shirt pulling it off. He has this thing about clothes. Shirts come off and pants stay on when he has his way. Makes him feel less exposed I guess. "So what are we doing?"


I pushed up against him earning a cute albeit startled squeak from him. He pushed back and we settle into an easy pace. Sometimes he'd start mouthing words I couldn't hear. It took me a while to realize that he was singing along to the music only he could hear. When I pointed it out he just shrugged and said it helped him keep the rhythm. I hated when it when he would do that. It meant he wasn't paying enough attention to me. So I'd kiss him.


That time however he had turned his head to the side to prevent it. "Malik."


"Fine." I pulled him closer. He tensed suddenly and without warning.

I loved the noises I could get him to make. He sounded like he was sobbing. These harsh panting gasps of pained pleasure. The first time he had made that noise I thought I had actually hurt him. He told me Bakura had taught him how to cry out like that. It took me even longer to figure out he was talking about his yami and not himself. It went straight to my cock. I shoved him off of me and pushed my pants down. He was still panting when I forced his mouth open and made him take me in his mouth.


I held his head still and thrust watching his throat work as he had tried to take as much of me as he could. The sight of those swollen lips around me had proved to be my undoing.


And the little fuck had swallowed it all greedily before he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and stood up. "I'm going to bed. Stay if you want or leave. It doesn't matter to me."


I watched him toss his boxers away and crawl back into bed with his back to me. "Go out with me. Like a date or something. Something that doesn't end up with us having sex wherever we can find a dark corner."


"No."


*Gomennasai for everything
Gomennasai, I know I let you down
Gomennasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now*


Looking back I know now why he always said no. Yami's can be self-centered, possessive beings after all.

He's gone now. Not gone as in he moved but gone as in his father came home one time he wasn't expected and Ryou had flipped. Laughing and crying at the same time. Going on about how it was all dear old dad's fault that even his thoughts weren't his own anymore.


They keep him so pumped full of medication now that I doubt he even knows his own name anymore.


Of course the one time I went to see him, before his father had me banned, he had looked up me with this wild look and started to sing to...me?...himself?...


I'm not sure it was all Bakura's fault though. Ryou had always been a bit off. Obsessed with death and the occult since his sister died. He even went as far as to blame himself for it happening. He kept telling the doctors that he had done it to her but he hadn't know it would hurt her. Not really hurt her. I asked him what it was he had done once.


He never answered.


I blame myself. I could have taken him away from that empty apartment. We could have seen the world together. But I didn't.

Maybe it was my fault. From the first day he had let me take him I had pushed for him to be himself instead of the person everyone else wanted him to be. But in a way I had done the same thing.


Ryou wasn't strong enough to be his own person.


I wasn't strong enough to be the way he needed me to be.


He loved me...He loved me not...He loved me...He loved me not.


He needed me.


I loved him...I loved him not...I loved him...I loved him not...


I failed him.

So I moved on.


*What I thought was a dream
A mirage
Was as real as it seemed
A privilege
When I wanted to tell you
I made a mistake
I walked away*


Truthfully it was Kaiba who approached me. He told me I owed him. I was inclined to agree. I didn't have much of a choice considering it was either that or relearn how to walk. Damn CEO.


Those ice blue eyes did me in though. I always was a sucker for pretty eyes.


So when he called me on morning to come to his office I didn't think twice about it. Sure he could be a dick but cruelness, true cruelty made him balk. Besides there was something there that intrigued me.


So I made my way to his office flirting with the girls that looked my way. If Seto did decide to explore his wicked side they would never believe it would be with me. As far as these airheaded little bimbos were concerned I was just a charity project. Someone Kaiba-sama was helping to use as a write off on his karma when it was called in.


He really is an asshole by the way.


I had only been trying to be helpful when I put the kohl around his eyes. He hadn't even said anything about it until he forgot to wash it off before his brother came home. It was hot though.


I guess when you're a big shot CEO you aren't allowed to do anything fun.


No need to wait at the door I just walked in throwing a wink at Kaiba's secretary who would start to grind her teeth every time she'd see me coming. I hated the sound and I think she knew it. Then again I'm sure she didn't like the noises I made either.


"You look like a thug."


"Thanks."


"I bought you clothes that actually fit instead of that whole too loose on bottom and too tight on top combo you seem so fond of. Why don't you wear them?"


"I don't like them. Face it Kaiba I'm not a polo and slacks type of guy. That's your department."


He pushed away from his desk and stood in an oddly graceful movement. Sometimes I wonder if he ever went through that whole awkward stage normal people went through. "One of the men in a meeting I was at today had blonde hair. Made me think of you."


He motioned me over. I think it pissed him off a little when I sauntered over to the couch instead. I knew why he had called.

Why he always called.

I laid down across the arm pretending to interested in the view outside. "I'll bet it did. You know Kaiba I picked this outfit just for you."


"You wore shorts and a sleeveless shirt for me? How...cute."


"Asshole."


"Hmm. You're in a bad mood today." He leaned over me to run a hand between my legs forcing me to move them apart. Those long fingers had eased my shorts down but I had been the one to let him pull them off. "I really did think of you this morning."


"There was no blonde was there?" I could feel his belt buckle brush against me as he undid his pants.


"There was no meeting. I just wanted to see you." A wet noise behind me drew my attention. At least he had remembered the lube this time.


Sometimes being a genius didn't mean you had any common sense.


I tried not to moan as he worked two fingers into me at once. The last thing I had needed was him thinking I liked this.
Still those long digits did have their uses and I had bucked back when they brushed that tender place inside.When two became three I raised my ass higher knowing that unless I told him it was okay he would just continue to finger fuck me until I came all over his expensive leather.


"Malik. I want to be inside you."


"Then do it."


He withdrew and I growled at the loss. A warm hand on my hip trying to turn me over brought me back to reality. "I'll leave."


He stopped. "I want to see you. Why won't you ever let me look at you when we do this?"


When I didn't answer he smeared the wet gel across his thick length. I tried to relax as he started to push into me. He liked to hold me still during that. Said it was so I wouldn't hurt myself. So he wouldn't hurt me. I tried to wiggle back but his firm grip kept me pinned.


Once he was fully sheathed he leaned against me.


"I'm not going to move until you say it."


My head had snapped up at the husky voice. "Kaiba, I'm not in the mood for this today. Just get on with it"

He had drawn back slowly and I had cursed my body for trying to follow his movements. I hadn't expected the force with which he had shoved himself back into me though. My back bowed, my nails dug into the arm of the couch and I whined.


"Say it Malik." He drew back again but was slower when he moved into me again. I hated it when he got like that.


"I'm not," He rolled his hips deep inside and I banged my head against the couch, "I won't say it."


He shifted to his knees and drew me back towards him and up so we were kneeling together. "Then let me see you."


I clenched my teeth together to keep from answering and was rewarded with deeper thrusts. I had let myself moan and cry out knowing that it would just make him want me more. Imagine my dismay when seconds before I found my release he had circled me with his thumb and finger to prevent the one thing I wanted desperately at that moment. I had doubled over cursing in every language I knew when he followed still thrusting

into me.


"Pick Malik. Let me see you or say it. Is either one really that bad? Why do you make me do this every time?"


I had thrown my head back to rest on his shoulder. "Let me come Kaiba."


"Pick." His teeth had grazed over my neck gently at first but when I shook my head no he bit down hard enough to leave marks. His hips never stopped their insistent movement. "Which one Malik?"


"Seto." He shuddered hard against my back and I caved. "Seto, please, love you, want you, need you. Please love. Seto love me."


"I do."


He released his hold on me and let me thrust against the cool leather until I came. His movement became shallower and I whined again as I felt the sudden rush of heat inside of me.


He didn't move away quickly. He never did. Still the sliding withdrawal made me wrinkle my nose. It wasn't as good of a feeling once it ended. I had sat up and pulled my shorts back on ignoring the feeling of his seed escaping me.


"You're a bully. You do know that right."


"I'm not a bully." He calmly buckled his belt. He always looked as well put together when we were done as he had before we started. Meanwhile I was always flushed and well lets admit it I looked like I had been thoroughly and completely fucked. "You do it to yourself. I don't know why you won't just admit it. I've told you so many times that I've lost count. It's not easy for me to say either you know but I do lo-"


"Don't say it. I don't care."


*Gomennasai, for everything
Gomennasai, Gomennasai,
I never needed a friend,
Like I do now
Gomennasai, I let you down
Gomennasai, Gomennasai, Gomennasai,
Gomennasai till the end
I never needed a friend
Like I do now*


He was the first person to tell me he loved me that didn't have to.


I hated it every time those words had passed his lips.


I didn't deserve his love.


I didn't deserve any of them.


After all I was born into darkness.


I grew up in darkness.


I brought darkness into their lives.


But as bright as their souls shined none of them could chase the shadows away.


So I keep looking.


Until one day I return to the dark.


I just wanted a friend.