One Year

Title: One Year
Author: Lee-Ann Shadowdancer
Rating: NC17
Pairing(s): Seto and Jou
Beta: Maggiemay, DracOnyx
Spoilers: Duellist Kingdom and Battle City
WARNING: This fic is NC-17 for a reason, and not just the lemon in the second chapter. There are references to abuse, rape, sodomy, violence and other not-nice things. This is NOT meant for kiddies.
Disclaimer: I don’t own YuGiOh. Or Jou. Or Seto. Though I think they might be renting space in my head…
Summary: It’s been one year since Jou and Seto got together, and the puppy is moving in. This is how they fell in love and their first night together as they put the past to rest and face the future.

A/N: Special thanks to my beta Maggiemay *glomps*, who suggested the ending for this.

One Year

“Jounouchi Katsuya! Where the hell do you think you’re going!”

My old man’s voice runs through the ragged remains of our apartment as I manhandle the last of my boxes out the door. He stands there, grey-streaked blond hair askew from passing out on the couch last night, his morning bottle in his hand, scowling at me.

“What the fuck do you care, you old bastard?” I snarl right back. “I’m leavin’. I’ve had enough of the drinkin’ and the fightin’ and the abuse. I’m gone.”

“What the fuck makes you think you can leave?” he demands, blinking bloodshot red eyes at me. He picks up a discarded bottle, pitching it at my head – I duck it with the skill of too many years.

“I’m eighteen. I can do what I want. Now fuck off.” There, the last of my stuff – not that I had much to begin with – safe and sound on the porch.

“I see. Gonna go be a man-whore for that rich prick now, huh? Gonna go live the good life and spread your legs for any man willing to pay the price?”

One minute I’m by the door, about to leave; the next I’m standing over him, fist stinging, him gaping at me from the floor, lying like the human waste he is amongst the tattered debris of his life.

“Don’t you dare.” I snarl. “Seto is the best thing that ever happened to me… and we’re happy together.” I step back and spit, watching it land on his boot. “You’re no longer my father. I never want to see you again.” With a flick of my wrist, I throw my key down at his feet and spin on my heel.

I refuse to let him see the tears as I walk out, never to return. 8 years of working and hoping and praying that we could be a family again – and it had all been for nothing.

Seto said he’d be coming for me at noon… in just a few minutes. My old life is behind me… and I have a whole new one to look forward to. A bittersweet feeling washes through me as I shiver slightly in the cold January wind, and I smile as I remember how it had all begun.

----- ------ ----- ----- ----- ------

I fell in love with Kaiba Seto at Duellist Kingdom.

It started, really, when I saw what Seto was willing to do to help his little brother… the same little brother that he had almost killed in Death-T. Cold and focussed, standing on the battlements of the annex, ready to take a step back and fall to his death rather than fail Mokuba.

But I realized it when I saw his smile. Not the cold, knowing, arrogant smirk he used while Duelling, but the true smile that melted his blue eyes and softened his features as he hugged Mokuba close. I fell hard then… because for a moment I saw the man behind the mask, the gentle yearning soul that his life would never let him be.

I buried it, of course… I didn’t have a chance in hell to be with him. After all, I didn’t even know if he was gay or bi, like me… and between his work at Kaiba Corp and Mokuba, there wasn’t room for anything else except Duelling. And even in that he refused to acknowledge me.

It hurt to know that he considered me a third-rate Duellist – I wasn’t even good enough to rank for a free Duel Disk at Battle City. And I didn’t have the money to afford a Duel Disk at full price… I should probably thank that Rare Hunter who hacked the system to get me in, even if he did only want my Red-Eyes.

All throughout Battle City, I tried to convince myself I was in love with Mai. She’s a wonderful lady, and I think I might have fallen for her… if I hadn’t already had a blue-eyed dragon nesting in my heart. I think she knew… when she left, the look she gave me was one I couldn’t read. But I knew, and she knew, that we were friends and nothing more.

Then my seventeenth birthday rolled around, and the day that changed my life.

Yugi and the rest of the gang had thrown me a surprise party at the Game Shop. Everyone was there – even Bakura and Marik, much to my shock. I don’t think anyone expected them to hang around after they got their own bodies, but they did. In fact, the only one invited who wasn’t there was my blue-eyed dragon. I hid my disappointment – his feelings were plain. Why sould take valuable time out of his day to celebrate the birthday of a third rate annoying mutt like myself?

So it was a shock when he showed up in person to pick up Mokuba, instead of just sending the limo. And a greater shock when he asked to speak to me…

I nearly fainted when he kissed me.

“Happy birthday, Katsuya.” He murmured into my ear as I tried to remember how to breathe and get my heart to slow down. “I was thinking… do you want to go out tomorrow night? There are some things I want to talk to you about…”

I managed a bemused nod – and I know I had a silly grin on my face.

“Tomorrow then… 7 o’clock. I’ll pick you up.”

----- ----- ----- ----
Absolute joy bubbles through me like too much champagne. Today is the day – Katsuya’s 18th birthday. The day we had agreed that – if we were still dating - he would come live with me – us - at Kaiba Mansion.

Gods… it’s been such a long and winding road… but worth it. Mokuba adores him, the rest of Yugi-tachi is thrilled, and I… I discovered the best thing that has ever entered my life.

The pity is that it took so very long for me to realize what a treasure I had yelling in my face… and to see just how alike we are.

People would laugh if they heard that. I’m the richest teenager in Japan, the CEO of Kaiba Corp, reputed to have ice-water – or machine oil – in my veins rather than blood. How could a streetwise punk from the slums and I be anything alike?

But we are. Broken homes, broken lives; the masks we wear to hide who we are, hiding the pain of betrayal that lives in our hearts… oh yes, my Golden Dragon and I are very much alike.

---- ----- ----

I fell in love with Jounouchi Katsuya in Duellist Kingdom.

Oh, not that I admitted it… but the fire of his spirit called to me even then… and the stubborn will inside that beautiful body… who wouldn’t be attracted? But I didn’t know then what I know now, that he’s bi. And I knew, or thought I knew, that he hated me. So I did what I always do – met hate with hate, tried to tear down his spirit with cold mockery. Attacking what I thought I could never have; but what could turn into a debilitating weakness.

I knew Jou had talent. He did come in second to Yugi in Duellist Kingdom, after all; but I ranked him as a 2 star duellist for Battle City, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to afford a Duel Disk to compete.

I didn’t want him there. I didn’t want to see him. The one that I wanted above all others; the one I could never have. And, perhaps even then a secret part of me didn’t want my puppy getting hurt.

But he got in anyway. I didn’t keep track of his progress in Battle City – I was more obsessed with Yugi and the God Cards. When mou hitori no Yugi told me that Jou and Anzu had been kidnapped… well, let’s just say I was very very angry with mou hitori no Yugi for getting Jou involved. And seeing him mind-controlled by Malik… He was stronger than that… too strong to turn against those he held as friends.

I thought my heart would burst with pride when he threw off Malik’s control. That was my stubborn Katsuya. Yugi-tachi thought I was being a cold-hearted prick when I just tossed the key into the water after him… they didn’t know what I knew… what I had seen the instant he threw off the control of the Rod.

Jou’s a dragon.

Oh, I call him puppy… but he’s a dragon, just like me - fiery, heartbreakingly pure golden dragon. I didn’t need to coddle or protect him – he would be insulted if I tried. That’s when I knew in my heart that I wanted him forever.

His performance over Mai… well, I could understand him being concerned… but it was too much. He was protective of her… but no more than he was of Yugi, or Shizuka. Hope flickered to life in my heart. Now if only he was bisexual…

It was all I could do not to storm up on that platform and rip Marik’s head off when he attacked Jou with the Winged Dragon. And when he died…

My heart froze; shattered into a millions tiny shards of ice. I’m not proud of goading mou hitori no Yugi on like I did that day… but I had to duel, or I would have gone insane. For Jou’s sake, I had to keep going… he’d died to stop Marik, so I would keep it going.

Yugi beat me, but I didn’t care. My puppy had come back, somehow. My Golden Dragon had defied Death itself to return. That was enough of a victory for me.

But I had to destroy the island. Gozoboro’s voice still rang in my head every time I hugged Mokuba, or thought of trying to take a chance and woo Jou.

Weak.

Useless.

Emotions are a weakness.

So I kept my mask in place, covering my desire with icy distain, though I wanted to do more than beat him in Duel Monsters when he challenged me. His spirit hadn’t dimmed; if anything, it burned brighter, stronger than ever. And he seemed to hate me even more. It hurt to just to see him, cut me to hear his voice, but I couldn’t look away.

Gods - he was beautiful.

Parting ways at the end of Battle City was enough, I thought. Putting the Pacific Ocean between us would cool the desire that burned behind my mask whenever I imagined Jou and his fiery passion in my life.

It didn’t work. Everyday I imagined what he would be doing, and every night I dreamed of him.

I think, in retrospect, the 18 months I spent in America were the worst of my life.

Then I came back, in January, to find Mai gone, and Jou unattached.

The 25th is his birthday – I knew that already, so I wasn’t surprised when Mokuba got an invitation to the party… I was surprised when I got one too. I refused initially – after all, I’m not a masochist. To see him and not to be able to touch him… that would be torture.

Needless to say, it was a shock to get a call on my cell from the Kame Game Shop – and to hear Honda Hiroto on the other end.

“Why didn’t you come to the party?” he’d demanded. I snorted. As if I would tell him the real reason.

“Because I have better things to do.” I answered coldly.

“Idiot. Jou was hoping you, of all people, would come.”

“I fail to see why.” My voice was flat, not betraying the flicker of hope or the fear of pain that warred in my stomach.

“Because he likes you, you cold-hearted bastard.”

The phone dropped. It took a full minute for the words to get through. Honda – who was closer to Jou than anyone except Yugi – claimed that Jou… liked… ME.

For a wild moment, I thought he meant only ‘like’. As in friends. But years as a businessman taught me to read the nuances of voice and tone… the slight emphasis on ‘like’ could only mean one thing.

Jou – had feelings for me. I felt a stirring in my soul – there was hope yet for me and my passion for my Golden Dragon.

I think I drowned Gozoboro’s voice out for once, calling myself 10 kinds of idiot. I should have seen it… how could I have missed it? All the fights, all the bluster. Gods, I should have seen it…

Heading out of my office and for the car, I called the limo and cancelled the pickup for Mokuba; that would be a good excuse to drop by there… and see for myself.

I don’t think I’ve ever been as scared as I was when I asked to speak to Katsuya; but the look on his face when I gave him his ‘birthday present’ was worth it; his smile could have warmed the city. It certainly warmed me.

------ ----- -----

I pull out of my thoughts as I see Jou’s apartment building in the distance. Time to make my dreams come true, and bring my puppy home.