rate_review Reviews

It is July 22, 2019!!! I know its been a few years since the completion of this story but I must say that I throughly enjoyed it!!! I decided to come back to AFF after all these years and I'm glad I did and ran across your story!! I love YY/Y and your story did a wonderful job in including life in ancient Egypt with Atemu as pharaoh again!! Loved seeing yami and yugi speak in ancient Egyptian!!! And my favorite part was yugi giving Atemu a lap dance in his throne room!!! Loved it!! Thank you for this wonderful story!!!

A couple of things that need fixing in this chapter...
Wrong-word typos:
Aught (noun): 'anything.' as in, "do you need aught else?" Ought (verb): 'should,' as in "Harvard ought have accepted me."
Gentiles are people who are not Jews. Genitals are sex organs. As far as I know, Yugi does not have any gentiles for Yami to fondle.
Clamor (noun): a loud and confused noise. Clamber (verb): climb, move, generally using both hands and feet.
A grammatical issue:
"He tried to stay quiet as he poured out his heart, fearful that Atemu might have followed him, and would find him if he was too loud, the other half knowing that Atemu would not chase after him."
Other half? You have to mention a first half before you can say “the other half.”
I ignore issues of comma usage because they are not so jarring as the above.
On the other hand, be pleased: I enjoy your story so much that I am continuing to read it despite the fact that my computer is (vexingly enough) determined to display certain aspects of formatting [e.g. "style='font-family:"Book Antiqua"'>"] showing up all through the text and necessitating a good bit of searching for the actual story through the coding issues. congrats, and I enjoy this thoroughly--though I do have a few questions. Ex: why did the millennium puzzle go with Yugi? physically, I mean. Also, does this mean that Yami does not have it any more?
(also, I am choosing to ignore several major issues of historical inaccuracy. For example, Atemu's reign in ancient Egypt is set around 3000 BC according to the anime...and Rome wasn't founded until over 2000 years after that. Caesar himself was practically contemporary with Jesus*--and lived two hundred years AFTER Alexander the Great.)
*He died in 44 BC.

An epic!!!

Congratulations for this amazing fic! It was reallly good to read it, to long for it, to cry for it - man!!! I almost lost it when Yugi was dieing, and I almost never cries!

You made their relationships beatifully, and when there was sex, that bigger connection, it wasn't sloppy, faster or carnal only. And I apreciated that, sometimes we forget what 'make love' means.

Great GREAAAAAT fic. But pay attention to the grammar from now on.

^.~

Poor, confused Yugi! Actually, the incongruousness of their mindset is driving me crazy but I really respect authors who pace themselves. I wonder why it bothers Yugi so much that he *believes* he's gay (more like convincing himself that he's not). Actually, I feel worse for Anzu in this chapter. She has no one to confide in regarding the events of the marketplace and no one to really understand her because all she has is Yugi (who's heart belongs to the Pharaoh). Another great chapter!

Oh Yugi, glad he`s finally consented. You're really clever in finding ways to get Atemu to seduce Yugi. Loved it!

This chapter totally floored me :).

It took the majority of two days but I finally managed to finish this story! For me, that quite the feat since I don't have the patience to start a completed story no matter how enticing the summary (or I start, get partway and then give up). But this story was sooooo addicting and I'm really glad I read it after it was completed. If I'd started any earlier, I think I would have died from impatience :). Again, loved the concept, the happy ending, and the way you constructed your lemons. Looking forward to your other works!

This is the first time I bothered to learn how this site works so it took me awhile to find the review button (which I thought worked the same way as fanfiction.net but I guess I was wrong). Anyways, no matter how long it took, I HAD to find it and review this story because that's how much I loved it so far. I would have left a review for every chapter (which may seem weird since I'm a latecomer) but I've been reading it on my phone and wouldn't have been able to say very much. Anyways, although I try to leave coherent and insightful comments for stories I really appreciate, I actually have no idea why I like this story so much. I think it might be because you've combined all the things I enjoyed about this show and used my favorite representation of each of your characters (if that even makes sense). Yugi, for one, is the same Yugi from season 0, the incredibly kind-hearted, gentle, empathetic high schooler most people can never identify with. I look at Yugi and think, 'do people like this even exist in real life?' The same goes for Yami. I don't think your portrayal of him is off at all because, as you've mentioned, he was a total wreck after what happened to Yugi in the Oricalcos season. On top of that, I really appreciate the fact that you refused to gloss over the realities of hierarchy in the ancient world and put your characters through the hell that probably would have existed back then. However, I'm also glad you didn't go too far with it and maintained the balance between your kindness to your characters and your cruelty towards them (basically, I just mean Yugi ^^).

Yugi is somewhat... ignorant but it's the kind of ignorance that you just can't help but love, especially since it's closely tied to his innocence. I don't really know how to convey that idea in a more sophisticated way but I think Atemu's reflection regarding Yugi's behaviour pretty much sums it up. In sum, this was probably one of the best puzzleshipping stories I've read so far and I'll try to leave reviews for as many chapters as possible.

~Chicary

Beautiful chapter! I loved both the humor and the angst in this. I didn't sense the choppiness that you mentioned in your endnote at all. Now, for the next chapter!

Oh wow, the action picks up with every chapter! I felt terrible for Atemu when he made Yugi dance for Pragus but I think anyone else would have done the same thing :). The ending sort of scares me though. Onto the next chapter!