AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Of a friend and boyfriends

by Bonsai

person Good grief...
schedule October 24, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Who are these people and what have you done to the real Ryou, Marik, Seto, ect?

Seriously, this fic is a holy mess.
person Tink
schedule October 6, 2005 at 12:00 AM
OMG! AND THE PLOT THICKENS!!!!!! XD I really like this fic! Ryous got some seriously bad issues to sort out. I wish Yami would fuck off and leave him alone after what he did. Poor little Ryou diddums. ^^ Im glad Baku is back.. or actually IN the story i should say. When you wrote in one of the first chapters "and lost his yami" i was like "OMGWTF?!?!" LOL! Yey for Baku.
Hmm, somehow i cant see Malik being happy Bakura is back though. lol.
Poor Ishizu ;_;
POOR MALIK! =(
I hope your beta gets back soon. Cant wait for updates ^-^
person yaoiboy
schedule October 4, 2005 at 12:00 AM
It is getting better and better every time i read a new chapter
person Cravesuicide
schedule June 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I love this story best one i have ever read........................................................................please update soon
person Kyle
schedule June 18, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Hey you shouldnt be sorry i cant even fine your typoes and that person doesnt like them the maybe he/she shouldnt read your story
person kupo
schedule June 8, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Dude, I feel sorry for you! I just finished Finals at my school. Anyway, good luck and update when you can!
person Rachel Dracon
schedule May 20, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I don't know if you care about your writing, some people who post online don't, so if you don't care about your writing just disregard this review.

I only got about halfway through the first chapter, simply because of the grammatical errors. It's a massive turn off to have mistakes in your writing everywhere, though a few typos are excusable. If you want to have quality writing, start proofreading. If that doesn't help or you already do, get someone else to proofread your stories; a beta would work wonders. At the very least watch out for things like the difference between 'there' and 'their,' there is nothing more annoying than reading something and coming across a 'to' where there should be a 'too,' or a 'there' where there should be a 'they're.'

This is not meant to be taken as an insult, just to be taken as advice for improving your story, what reviews exist for in my opinion.
person kupo
schedule May 13, 2005 at 12:00 AM
woot updates! I think Yami's trying to get his boyfriend back. So is he going to the party?
person kupo
schedule May 3, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Yay!!!! WE got a lemon. That was great! But I got upset when he got that phone call. Oh well update soon!
person Yamima
schedule May 2, 2005 at 12:00 AM
what happens next???

(Waiting paitently)