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January 9, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Melikes. This was really good for a first fic. It was a little.. all over the place, the continous changing pov's was confusing every now and again. And it does seem a little rushed but very very cute. I would've expected a bit more getting to know each other before the fucking but i'm not complaining *wink*
Theres only one thing i would consider changing, and that is.. once they actually get together, even right from the kiss i would have them call each by their first names. It's just seems a little wrong that they were sleeping together and still referring to each other as "Bakura" and "Kaiba" as opposed to Ryou and Seto.. which, if i do say so myself, is much cuter anyway.
Thats all. I really enjoyed it though, very very cute ^^
Is there anymore??
Theres only one thing i would consider changing, and that is.. once they actually get together, even right from the kiss i would have them call each by their first names. It's just seems a little wrong that they were sleeping together and still referring to each other as "Bakura" and "Kaiba" as opposed to Ryou and Seto.. which, if i do say so myself, is much cuter anyway.
Thats all. I really enjoyed it though, very very cute ^^
Is there anymore??
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January 24, 2005 at 12:00 AM
AWSOME! This story is so great you should have a ton of reviews! I am loving every minute of this fiction please update soon i can't wait to see more! Keep it up and i'll keep reviewing! Great story i can't wait for the next chapter!