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for Lost in the Sands

by UnfinishedMelody

person randomperson
schedule October 26, 2006 at 12:00 AM
This is good! Anything with ancinet Egypt in is almost always good, but this is REALLY good. I like the writing style, and the description of Yuugi, and...everything! Be sure to write more soon!
person Ashley
schedule December 8, 2003 at 12:00 AM
-Blinks.- Kitty? As in Winter's Maiden? -Shrug.- Doubt you remember me, we used to talk online I think either 2001 or 2002. -Shrug.- I lost my AOL, but I do have Adelphia so I still have my fics and I can access the AOL.com site so I can still check my e-mail. I've read this on FF.net, I think. Don't remember. School has me going 'wheeeee, look at the pwetty star the then I go to sleep. u.u; Anyway, I'll be watching for updates. See ya.
person Mahayana
schedule December 7, 2003 at 12:00 AM
Sounds good so far. ^_~ I love the opening sentence though, it's very poetic. "A sigh left slightly parted lips" is just beautiful.
One thing about your writing though, the dialogue doesn't match the time period. I don't think they would be using phrases like "don't have a camel" [as amusing as it is ^_~] in their speach. Especially the Pharaoh. I really can't see him using 'man'.
But otherwise your writing is good. ^_~ Keep going~ I can't wait to see more of this story.
person alostblackcat
schedule December 7, 2003 at 12:00 AM
that was a cool story!!!

what are the pairings... you didn't put them...

please update soon!!!

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